New School, New Life, New Feelings
by Never.To.Late
Summary: A modern day story where Ed moves to a new school. He begins a new life after his mom dies. New feelings are brought to the surface. When he meets his neighbor Roy what will happen? Will he find love in his new, busy life?
1. Moving Day

New School, New life, New feelings

Chapter 1: Moving Day.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of FMA or any of the characters.

A/N So please bare with me. I may make this a little ooc in the beginning. If you have any hints or ideas to help please feel free to message me.

Mom had died. That was all I knew. She had been sick for a while but Al and I always managed. Trisha Elric, My mother, was one of the strongest women I knew. How can someone so strong leave. Al and I were being sent to live with Pinako and her Granddaughter Winry. We had met them before. Auntie Pinako was practically family. As for Winry, well Al has a thing for her. Now we are on the plane to their state from where we used to live. I haven't cried since the day mom died. Al uses my shirt to blow his nose every five minutes. In all my sixteen years i have never been more confused than the day my mom died. I thought she'd be here forever. Dad left when I was eight. Auntie Pinako and Winry are all we have left now.

The plane landed and hour and a half later and we got off. Winry stood waiting in her best dress next to Auntie Pinako. We made our way over to them. Winry ran and met Al halfway in a tight embrace. They were both knocked to the floor by the impact and I laughed gently. I wish mom could see this. Quickly I banished the thought from my head and walked to Auntie Pinako with my luggage in hand.

" Edward Elric, It's good to see you," She smiled around the pipe in her mouth.

" Yeah same here old lady," I smirked.

" My Ed, Have you gotten smaller again?" She grinned.

Normally I would have shouted back but today I just didn't have the energy. She seemed to notice and just put a hand on my arm. We packed into the car and went to get settled in our new home. I was a little nervous in a new town and all. It was a small town with nice people from what I remember before mom moved us half way across the world. As we drove I saw glimpses of shrubbery and small neat houses. What a rural area. Maybe I would like it here. We pulled up to a little , cozy looking house. I smiled as I stepped out. When we went in, it was neat inside and the paint was a nice color.

" Your room is here Ed," Winry took my suitcase and put it in a room.

The room was nice with red painted walls. The curtains were black and it looked as if I would fit in here. I smiled and put my clothes in the wooden dresser as winry showed Al his room across the hall. I pulled back the curtains and let the sun in. My eyes strayed across the street where I saw a boy of about seventeen years standing in his room. He looked up, smiled at me and waved. I waved back and blushed at getting caught. He smiled and pointed down at his lawn. I shook my head to tell him I didn't understand. He just smiled and left his window. I stood shocked at his sudden disappearance. Then there was a knock downstairs and I heard a deep voice.

" Hello Mrs. Rockbell, I noticed you have some guests staying with you and wondered if you wanted help showing them around?" The voice said.

" Well, Roy, That's awfully nice of you but they should probably get settled in first. Would you like to come in for a little?" Pinako asked.

" Yes, thank you," The boy had nice manners whoever he was.

I went down the stairs slowly and peaked around the corner. I saw the teenage boy. He was tall and thin. His black hair was shiny and his eyes were so dark they looked black also. His smile was very sweet and I thought he had an arrogant look about him. He looked up to see me staring and smirked at me. Roy walked past Pinako and went to the place I was standing.

" Hey," He greeted.

" Hi," I fought a blush.

" You're a lot shorter than you look from your window," Roy whispered.

I gritted my teeth against the oncoming rage. It spilled out anyway.

" **Who're you calling so small that they need a ladder to see out their window**?" I yelled in one breath.

" Woah, Breath kid," Roy chuckled at my reaction.

" So, what's your name?" I asked calming down.

" Roy Mustang," He answered shortly.

" I'm Edward Elric. Do you know the Rockbells well?" I inquired.

" Pretty well. Winry is best friends with my sister,Riza," Roy stated.

I smiled as Pinako walked up with a cup of tea. She handed it to Roy and smiled at him. I just watched as he said thank you and turned back to me.

" So what brings you here," Roy asked.

I didn't know what to say. I didn't want his pity or anything. So I quickly came up with a lie. I was aware of Pinako listening.

" Just visiting My old friends," I played it off like it was okay.

" How long," He asked sipping his tea.

" For a couple of years," I smiled bitterly.

He seemed to notice my attitude and let the questions go. I was thankful and he just silently drank his tea.

" So want to show me your room?" Roy tried to make small talk.

" Ummm... It isn't ready yet," I sighed.

" Sure but I could help you set up your stuff," Roy offered.

I smiled and showed him up the stairs to my room. He smiled when he entered it.

" Oh this is the room Riza stays in when she sleeps over," Roy looked around.

I showed him my stuff and he helped me find a place for everything. I put on music from my radio. It kept my mind busy. Roy asked a few more small questions like what grade I'm in, if I was going to his school with Winry or if I was going to the private school, And what kind of music I liked. I did my best to answer. I was going into junior year in his school, and liked a long list of different bands and music. He offered to show me around school on Monday when I started. I graciously accepted seeing as I knew if Winry showed us around Al would get most of the attention and I would be ignored. Around five Roy picked up his cellphone, which I didn't even hear ring. He talked for a few minutes and then hung up.

" I have to go because my mom finished dinner. Listen on Monday I'll pick you up here and walk to the bus stop with you. Then We'll go to the office and I'll show you around," He smiled.

I said thanks and walked him out. I watched him jog across the street. He was perfect in almost every single way. I smiled at the thought and then felt something rushing through my stomach. It was like a big field of butterflies erupting in my stomach. Great more confusion when I already feel like my head will explode from this whole mess.

Dinner was done and we sat to eat. Winry and Al talked animatedly and then they turned to me.

" Ed, want to go to a movie with me, Al, Riza, and Roy?" Winry asked

" Sounds like fun," I attempted to smile but my mind was elsewhere.

" Good," Al said," We'll clean as soon as we're done and then go."

I nodded and put another forkful of food in my mouth. They went back to talking and I went back to thinking. After dinner we cleaned up and I decided to change my outfit. I saw a piece of paper on my dresser and didn't remember leaving it there. I picked it up and read it.

Ed,

Sorry I had to leave. If you need anything else just call my number is on the back.

Roy

I smiled and changed my outfit. We went across the street and knocked on the door. A girl of about sixteen answered. She looked so different from Roy. Her blond hair was tied in a hairclip and she had brown eyes with a hint of red in them. She was tall and thin also. I introduced myself to her and she smiled. Then her and Winry starting talking.

" Brother, Are you all right?" Al asked.

" Yeah," I smiled.

Roy showed up behind Riza with a jacket strung over his arm. He smiled at me and they began to walk to the movies. It wasn't a far walk and I stood off to the side. Once we had the tickets we went to sit in the theater. It was dark and cool. I shivered as the cold air hit my bare arms. Without a word Roy offered me his jacket and I looked up. He had a smile on his face so I took it. I had to sit next to him and resist the urge to put my head on his shoulder when I got tired. After the movie we walked back. I was walking with my head bent backwards staring at the stars. I collapsed on my front lawn so I could stare at the magnificent sight that was the sky. Then I realized I still had Roy's jacket. I stood and went across the street to give it to him. He answered the door and I handed it to him.

" Here, I forgot to give it to you before," I said shyly.

" Thanks," He closed the door and stood next to me.

" It's beautiful out. The stars," I tilted my head back.

" Yeah," Roy agreed looking at me.

He sat in the grass and patted the spot next to him. I sat and he lay back. I followed his example and silently we both watched the world turn into a dark oblivion above us. Finally I got up to leave. Roy patted my head and walked me up to the door. I smiled as he went back to his house. I climbed the stairs to my room and got right in to my bed.

" Goodnight mom," I whispered.


	2. Monday aka A living Nightmare or Not

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 2: Monday aka A living Nightmare or Not...

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the idea for this story...

I woke with a start as my alarm clock rang loudly. It was Monday morning. I start my new school today. My nerves were flaring as I prepared for this event. I brushed my hair and dressed in the uniform. The navy blue pants were comfortable and the white dress shirt was a little long in the sleeves. So I rolled them up. I tried to eat breakfast but it wouldn't settle right because my nerves. I brushed my teeth and got my book bag ready. Then I sat and waited for Roy. It was seven thirty before there was a knock on the door. I jumped to answer it expecting Roy. When I opened it I saw Riza standing there. She was holding up a skirt.

" Winry called because she needed to borrow my skirt for school," Riza smiled.

" Oh Thanks, Riza," Winry said from behind me.

She took the skirt and Riza walked in. I shut the door and went back to sitting inside. Then another knock came at the door. I opened it and there stood Roy in his school uniform. He looked... Well... Hot! I blushed as I stared at him. Then I got control of myself.

" Hey Roy," I stood aside to let him in.

" Hey shrimp," He smirked.

I ignored the comment and followed him in. He sat on the couch with his hands on his knees. I looked at him. Suddenly he stood. I watched him to see what he was doing.

" Come on Winry or we'll be late," He warned.

" Coming," She yelled.

Then he said goodbye to Auntie Pinako. He went to the door and motioned for me to follow. I went with him outside.

" The bus stop is this way but it is a bit of a walk," He said.

He began to walk and I followed him like a lost puppy. He hummed a tune as I walked beside him. I asked him What song it was.

" Every Light in the house is On. It's a country song heard this morning and it got stuck in my head," He answered.

" Can you sing some of it?" I asked.

" Well," He began.

" Please it's just us. The others are way back there," I pleaded with him.

He nodded and began to sing the song from the beginning. I stared in awe at how his voice sounded. It was such a warm sound that I got lost in the words and shut my eyes for a second. A small smile crossed my face as I listened to him sing shyly. It sounded beautiful and when it was over I was sad. He looked down at me and saw that I was smiling to myself.

" That was amazing," I sighed forgetting where I was.

" It was just me singing," Roy chuckled.

" But it was so great," I assured him and realized where I was again.

We got to the bus stop a few minutes later. When the bus came Roy politely stepped aside and let me on first. The others were behind us talking. I took a seat and he sat next to me. It was a confined space but I felt comfortable. He shifted slightly so there was more room.

" So are you excited about your first day," He asked me.

" Not really. I'm more scared that it will be a living nightmare," I sighed sadly.

He chuckled and smiled again. His voice was quiet in the loud atmosphere of noise. I cringed at the noise feeling a headache coming on. Roy patted my shoulder gently and suddenly all I was aware of was his warm hand on my shoulder. I felt the butterflies again and shivered.

" Are you cold again?" He asked.

" No. Just got a chill," I looked down.

My heart was racing and I felt as if I had run a marathon. The bus stopped in front of the school. Roy stood and reached out a hand to help me stand too. My legs were wobbly from the ride there. Roy chuckled at this because he didn't know he was part of the reason my knees were weak right now. These feelings were so odd to me. So new. I had never felt as if I was about to fly away from increasing butterflies pounding against my ribs or felt my heart race a mile a minute. All for one boy. Was it even right to feel this way seeing as I am also a boy. I lost all track of thought when Roy's hand actually touched mine. We walked into the school together.

I went wide eyed at the school. They weren't many kids because it was a small community but the school was huge. I stopped dead in my tracks and looked around. When Roy realized I wasn't behind him he stopped too and called me. I shook my head and ran to catch up. We entered the office and stood besides Winry and Al. The people were really nice to us. We were given schedules and a map of the school. Roy smiled when he went to class and promised to meet me after school so he could show me around more. I smiled at the thought and then used my map to find my first class. Great it was English. This meant that I had to read first thing in the morning, which means that I get to read for homework. I liked this class already. I walked in and looked up to see a bunch of curious faces looking at me. The teacher smiled kindly and gave me a seat after checking my schedule. She introduced me but didn't make me give any kind of speech. I liked her too.

Class passed in a blur and I was aware of the teacher giving a lesson but it reminded me of when my mom read to me. I couldn't do this now. So I tried hard to listen. The bell rang signaling a new period.

" Hey, new kid. Want me to help you find your next class?" A blond boy next to me asked.

" Sure, thanks! I'm Ed and you are?" I asked.

" Jean Havoc. Nice to meet you," He replied.

I showed him my next class and he took me there. I thanked him again and went in. Now I was in chemistry. I knew I would get top marks in this class. The teacher was a little annoying, However. The class was a little loud but I still tried my best to follow the lesson. The kid next to me was taking notes too. I asked him for question five because I missed it.

" Question five was about chemical reactions and how it differs from Chemical bonding," The boy said.

" Thanks," I scribbled it down.

" Hey you're new aren't you?" The boy stated.

" Yeah," I smiled a little.

" I'm Kain fuery. What's your name?" He asked.

" Edward Elric But you can call me Ed," I answered.

Making friends seemed to be easy today. I didn't know why. Hmmm... Maybe it was my charming looks and personality. Kain and I talked about chemistry and other things all through class. He smiled when I mentioned my neighbors.

" I know Riza and Roy. Havoc has been after Riza for a few months now. She's about ready to give in for a date," Kain smirked.

" You mean Jean Havoc. Well he does seem nice," I stated.

" He is nice compared to his cousin, Breda. Quarter back of the football team and seems to think the world owes him," Kain retorted.

When the bell rang Kain and I walked together to our next class, Which was algebra two. He introduced me to the teacher and then told me I could sit next to him. He pointed out Breda, who was in our class. I looked at him and decided not to become one of his enemies. Then I looked up to see Roy walking in. He sat in front of Kain and looked at me.

" Hey Fuery. Hey Ed," He took out his notebook

Havoc walked in and sat next to Roy. The two began to talk and I just sat back and waited for the class to start. I found the lesson immensely easy. When the bell rang again it was time for lunch. We made our way to the cafeteria. When we got there Winry, Al, and Riza met us. Havoc slung his arm over Riza shoulder. She smiled and shrugged out of the hold. Winry and Al talked. I sat not really eating. I was thinking about my mom again and how she used to pack our lunches. A voice interrupted my thoughts.

" What's wrong shrimp? You haven't touched your food," Roy asked.

I was to distracted to have an outburst. So I looked dumbly at Roy as if I couldn't understand what he said. As if to emphasize his point he picked up the sandwich in front of me and tried to make me take a bite. Riza giggled at the sight and Al and Winry, knowing what was wrong, looked worried.

Al stood and pulled me aside. Roy looked at me and sighed.

" Brother are you okay?" Al asked

" Yeah. Why wouldn't I be? I was just thinking," I replied easily.

" About mom," He asked sadly.

" Well... Yeah," I looked down.

" It's okay to be sad," Al patted my shoulder.

" I know it's just that i have to be strong for you," I smiled bitterly.

" Be strong for me? We need to be strong for each other. Crying doesn't make you weak!" Al told me looking shocked.

I nodded and we went to sit down. I picked up my sandwich and took a bite. Roy looked at Al who just shook his head. I kept looking down. Only three more classes left. I had History, A study period, and Gym. These classes went by fast in my anticipation to meet Roy at the end of the day. When the final bell rang I shuffled my books around and was glad that I found a locker. I had no homeworks because I finished it in study hour. I met Roy in the main hallway and he asked if I needed to know anything else about the school. I just shook my head. I could find my classes and all so I was fine. He smiled at me and we headed for the bus. The ride home was quiet for us again. When we got to the stop we met up with the others. The whole way home they chattered. I shuffled my feet and fell behind. It looked like rain but I knew it wouldn't. Not until I was ready to cry myself. I wasn't ready yet. Roy slowed and walked beside me until the others were far ahead.

" Hey, Ed, Can I ask you something?" Roy looked down.

" Sure," I looked at him.

" Do you trust me?" He looked in my eyes.

Oh no. My pulse was racing and I was melting in his eyes. I nodded and tried to calm myself.

" When your ready will you tell me what's bothering you so I can help?" He looked sad.

" Yes, When I am ready you'll know," I realized I was at my house.

On a split decision I hugged him around his chest and before he could react I ran inside.


	3. Ready for the Rain

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 3: Ready for the Rain

Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I put a song in here I don't own that either. Just in case...

My first week of school was a success. I had managed to survive. Roy was a real savior. Whenever I needed help he was there. I smiled at that thought and felt the damn butterflies again. Riza had finally agreed to go out with Havoc, as long as Winry and Al went too. I was invited to go along but chose to stay home. A glance at the clock told me it was ten. I smiled as I lay back on my bed. My thoughts overcame me again. I found myself staring at the ceiling fighting tears again. I needed a distraction. Auntie Pinako was asleep on the couch she was out. Fuery was tutoring Breda in Algebra, poor guy. Roy! I searched through my dresser and found the note. I dialed the number.

" Hello," A voice asked.

" Hey, It's Ed. Can you come over? I'm kind of bored and lonely," I asked.

" Sure just a minute," He said.

I peaked through my curtains at him. He was lying on his bed too. His arm crossed his chest and he had a phone in one hand which was now shut. He stood and I saw why he needed a minute. He had no shirt or pants on. Just his boxers. I blushed and looked away.

He knocked lightly on my door a minute later. I opened it and he smiled hesitantly at me. I let him in and silently we climbed the stairs to my room. Outside clouds gathered and it looked like rain.

I sat on my bed and brought my knees to my chest. Roy sat next to me and put his hand on my back. He looked concerned.

" I moved here because... My mom... She died. It was a long battle with the illness she had fought. Finally Al and I let go. She just died. The part that kills me is I held her hand. I sat next to her with Al and we held her hand. I told her it was okay. That we wanted her to be happy. She died after she told us she loved us and to take care of each other," I had started to cry.

The skies opened and rained poured. Roy looked at me and slipped his arms around me. I held on to him like he was a lifeline. My tears soaked his shirt as I curled my body into his. His warmth was comforting. Gently he leaned back against my head board bringing us both back. I was still in his arms when lightening flashed across the sky. I put my head up and suddenly I wanted to be out there. I stood and took Roy's hand in mine. I led him outside and out the door. The rain hit me and I just smiled as it slid down my face mixing with the tears on my face. I closed my eyes and turned my face upwards letting the rain touch me. It felt as if the rain were tears from someone crying for me. Roy's arms found their way around my waist and I put my head on his chest. He held me tightly as the rain soaked us both. We knew we'd probably get sick but we didn't care. I looked up to see Roy. His hair was soaked and plastered to his forehead. His clothes clung to him. He looked at me and smiled. It was like everything was okay as long as he was there. I wrapped my arms around his neck and stayed close to him as I watched the storm. It was windy and cold with rain. The rain drops stung like needles as they lashed against us. Thunder boomed above us and I felt as if the world was playing a melody to help me feel again. Instead of numb I could see the world so much more clearly. It was like I was new again. Roy shivered next to me and I felt my warmth leaving too. We went inside again a few minute later.

" You should dry off. We don't need you getting sick," Roy tugged at my shirt.

When that was off he handed me a new one from the drawer he helped me put them in. I slipped it on. I pulled my pants off and he handed me a new pair. I pulled them on and fumbled with the button. He pushed my hand away and buttoned them for me. I felt weird letting him do that but oddly comfortable. He was soaked too.

" You should change too," I said.

" I'm to tall for your clothes. Let me run home and get some. I'll be right back. Okay," He offered.

" Okay," I agreed.

He lifted my chin in his hand and looked in my eyes. Then he put his lips against my forehead. I felt a blush rise in my face. He swiftly walked out of the room. I picked up a book and began to read. He returned a few minutes later. He changed in my room as to not get wet again on the way back. Roy climbed into the bed next to me. He sat perfectly still until I cuddled against him. Then he settled against me as well. We sat in silence for a while.

I'm guessing we fell asleep because I woke up when the door opened and Al and Winry's voices sounded. They were laughing loudly. Apparently Havoc went to kiss Riza and they got splashed by a huge puddle as a car drove past. I let out a small laugh when I heard this. Not wanting to get caught I got up and shut my door. Then I settled down again. Roy wrapped his arms around me and hugged me. I melted into his touch and fell back asleep. I woke up warm and feeling well rested. Roy stirred beneath me. He handed me my book.

" You're into romance novels," He looked at me with a smirk.

" Yes," I blushed.

" Cute," He smiled appreciatively.

When, I asked myself, did I fall in love with a boy I've known for a week? It didn't matter though. What mattered was that it happened. I fell in love with Roy Mustang. Unwillingly I pulled myself away from him and stood.

" So what are we going to tell them?" I thought out loud.

" How about the truth?" Roy stood behind me.

" I guess that will have to work because I have nothing else," I frowned.

We went downstairs and saw auntie Pinako on the couch watching T.V. Winry and Al were eating breakfast. When they saw Roy they looked confused. They looked at each other and then back at us.

" When did you get here Roy?" Al asked.

I looked at Roy but he shook his head at me.

" Last night," Roy scratched his neck.

" Oh," Al said.

" Ed needed a friend," Roy smiled down at me.

Al nodded and looked at Winry. She just smiled and nodded to Roy. As if to say Thank You. Roy stood next to me. Our arms were touching but I felt like he wasn't close enough. I don't now why I wanted to but I had the urge to just hug him. Maybe because it was comforting and I want to be comforted. For once I wanted something for me. I smiled as Al handed me a bagel with cream cheese on it.

" You want anything Roy?" Al asked.

" Just some coffee please," Roy replied.

Al made him a cup. He asked how much sugar and milk. Roy told him a little milk and two spoons of sugar should do. I ate my bagel quietly just watching everything around me. My mind was so perceptive. The T.V. was loud and my head was swimming. I sneezed loudly. Shit... I was getting a cold. Roy put a hand on my head and pulled it back.

" You have a fever," He said.

" Maybe you should lie down the Ed," Winry said.

I felt faint and my knees gave way. Roy caught me. He picked me up bridal style.

" I've got this," He said.

With that he carried me upstairs and lay me down in my bed. He pulled the covers over me and put his lips to my forehead again. After that he hurried downstairs and came back with a cup of tea and some tissues. He sat in my chair and picked up a book.

" Can I read to you for a while?" He looked at me.

I nodded and listened to his deep voice as he read aloud from one of my favorite books. My imagination easily got carried away and I was picturing Roy and I as main characters in this book. Roy being the dashing hero who always saves me in the last minute. In some ways it was true. I remembered last night and how it felt when he held me. I missed it already.

I fell asleep listening to him read. I was vaguely aware of the dreams I was having. I guess Roy got worried because he woke me up.

" Are you okay? You were thrashing and it looked like you were having a nightmare," He asked.

I nodded. He climbed into bed and held me again. I smiled and thought to myself. I was ready, ready for the rain but it looks like I may have found the sunlight after storm as well.


	4. Fevered Illusions

New School, New Life, New Feelings

chapter 4: Fevered Illusions

Disclaimer: I own nothing including songs... If I do put any in here.

I was drifting in my mind when I saw it. I was standing in front of my own house. Al and I were playing in the front yard as always. We were running and laughing. My feet moved so fast as I ran to her. My mother was doing laundry again. We ran to her and tugged on her sun dress. She looked down at us and smiled.

" My beautiful boys," She took us in a hug.

" Mom we love you!" We hugged her back.

Soon she began to fade and I looked for her everywhere. I was walking in my kitchen with a bag of vegetables for mom to make stew. When I opened the door and called for her was when I saw her. She had fallen to the ground and was unconscious. I freaked because at fifteen I had no idea what to do. Al stayed calm and called the hospital. An ambulance came to pick her up. We rode with her both holding her hand. My body began to shake and I was crying. Was I reliving this? Maybe I was asleep but why wasn't I waking up. My eyes fought to open as I saw her dying in my mind. Why was this happening again. Hadn't Al and I been through enough.

My eyes snapped open to see my room coming in to view. I felt my face and felt the tears there. My mind was oddly blank and then one word fell into place. Roy! I tried to call him but my throat was scratchy. Pinako came in quietly.

" Ed," she called.

I coughed loudly and she patted my back.

" Where did Roy go," I asked in a hoarse whisper.

" He had to go home. His parents needed him," Pinako patted my head.

" He'll be back later," Al said from the doorway.

I nodded and Al handed me a cup of tea and some medicine which I choked down. I sat and read A new book that Winry and Al had brought for me. I was on page forty when there was a soft knock on my door. I looked up to see Roy's frame in the doorway.

" Hey did you miss me?" He smirked.

" Hmmmmm," I sounded like I was thinking.

" I want you to meet my best friend, Maes Hughes," Roy pointed at a boy who was standing next to him.

The boy looked older by a couple of years. Maybe around nineteen. He walked in and shook my hand. I smiled as best as I could. He pulled out his wallet.

" Hey Ed, Want to see some pictures?" He asked.

" Oh no," Roy breathed.

" This is my fiance Gracia. Isn't she the most beautiful lady you've ever seen. Hmmm... Don't you think so," He shoved the photos in my face.

I nodded my head feeling about to explode. Roy took his wallet and folded it. Then he handed it back to him.

" He's sick, Hughes. Let him be," Roy sighed in annoyance.

I picked up my book and tried to read more while they talked.

" New book, Huh Shrimp," Roy said.

I glared and instead of yelling wrote down on paper, Who you calling so short that this book could crush him. He chuckled again and smirked.

" I believe that's you, Ed," Hughes scratched his head.

I gave him a sarcastic look and went back to my book. Hughes sat down at my computer and started to type stuff. I didn't ask what. Roy sat next to me on the bed and asked if I've eaten today. I shook my head and he looked at me as if he was angry. He brought up some soup for me and I tried to eat. It hurt my throat a little. I winced at the burning liquid flowing down my throat.

" Ed, do you mind if I go home tonight?" Roy whispered.

" Sure. I think I'll be okay," I rasped out.

He smiled and gave me another spoonful of soup. Soon he left to take Hughes home and get some family time. I read for a while and fell asleep due to my medicine. It was a dreamless sleep and I only saw black. Thankfully it was Saturday so by Monday I should be fine. I woke up around four in the morning and couldn't fall back asleep. I went downstairs and made some tea. Then I put on some music on my computer to make it a little easier to bare being couped up. I read some more of my book and was getting into it when my phone rang. It was a number I didn't recognize.

" Hello," I said.

" Hey, It's me Fuery. I heard from Havoc that you were sick and was wondering if you needed anything," Fuery offered.

" A new body that isn't spinning," I chuckled.

" How about Havoc and I visit," he laughed.

" Sounds okay," I smiled at the thought of company.

He laughed again and said they would be over at about nine. I looked at the clock and realized that it had been four hours since I woke up. I wondered why he was calling so early but it wasn't early anymore. I said okay and hung up. I heard a sharp rap of knuckles on my window. I looked out but saw nothing. Then it came again and I went to my other window which was on the side of the house. I opened it when I saw Roy. He was standing on a ladder at my window.

" I have a door you know," I said in shock.

" Yeah but I thought maybe we should get a fire ladder. You know the kind that roll up so I can visit anytime," he rushed the statement in a whisper.

I looked at him as if to say are you serious? He just nodded. I nodded back. He hugged me tightly and smiled.

" This way I'll always be there when you need me," he announced.

In the next second I felt everything as a blur. Before I knew what was happening he had me laying down again. He put his hand on my head.

" Your fever is gone," He smiled.

He put his lips to my forehead again and felt my head like that. I melted under his soft lips and almost fainted. Maybe it was just me but I felt as if he was coming onto me. I took in his appearance. His baggy sweatshirt and tight jeans. His messy hair as if he had just woken up and thrown his clothes on. I smiled at the thought that he was so eager to see me. I looked up again and his angelic face was inches away from mine. Was he going to kiss me? As the fates would have it I never found out because my phone rang telling me that Havoc and Fuery were here. He sighed and backed away a little. They came up to my room after Auntie Pinako let them in.

" Hey chief," Havoc smiled around the cigarette in his mouth.

" Hey," I said my voice was getting stronger.

They sat and we talked for a while and hung out. It was fun seeing as we all knew each other. We teased Havoc about his date with Riza. He scowled but in the end we were all laughing together. After a while they had to go. Once all goodbyes were said Roy walked them out. When he came back he silently sat next to me. He stared out my window into the sky which was bright. I watched him carefully.

" It would be great if I could fly," He smiled," I've always wished I could. Ever since I knew about angels. My mom laughed when I told her but it didn't discourage me at all. Instead I began to write about dreams I had in which I was flying. In one of those dreams I died but I wasn't afraid. Instead I was exhilarated. It felt like I was really soaring. That was the night you came."

I wondered why he was telling me this. My mind couldn't quite register. He kept staring at the sky.

" I gave up on flying that night. When I saw you I felt like I couldn't breath. It felt exactly like a crash. My mind shut down and my throat constricted. I was really good at pretending I was fine because I didn't understand it but when I had the dream it clicked. I liked the feeling of it. The whole time we were under the stars I had the feeling bubbling in my chest. I feel it now sitting close to you. When I held you it felt right. I wanted to be as close to you as possible and it still isn't close enough. I think I am falling in love with you!" His eyes gleamed and I felt my heart soar.

His lips swept over mine and I felt his arms close around me. His warm lips were on mine. Oh dear me. In that instant I was sure that this wasn't one of my fevered illusions.


	5. The Calm Peacefulness After The Storm

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 5: The Calm Peacefulness After The Storm.

Disclaimer: See previous chapters... On with the story.

It was Friday at last again. It had been a week since I told Roy. As we walk home from the bus he slips his hand around mine. His fingers stroked the top of my hand. I smiled and brought his hand to my lips letting them graze over it. He smiled down at me. I thought Roy was secretive but he wasted no time letting everyone know I was his. He stole kisses in the hallway and held my hand when we walked. He looked at me constantly unless it was time to pay attention in class or he wasn't there. I loved it because I felt there was something to live for now. I was happy again as if mom had planned it all along. There was a comfortable silence all the way home. When we stood in front of my house he bent over me a little. His lips touched mine and I closed my eyes letting passion rain over me. He smirked into the kiss. Yesterday we had gotten the ladder and he called me at two in the morning to put it down for him. He came and slept next to me until we had to get up for school. He climbed down and went home then. I smiled as he pulled away and I slowly opened my eyes. I called it awakening from the trance which Roy laughed at. I silently brushed his hair out of his eyes and smiled. Then I went inside. He blew me a kiss as I closed the door. We were going to the movies again tonight but with everyone. Havoc, Riza, Winry, Al, Fuery, Breda and some girl named Chezka. I couldn't wait until we met them there and had a night out. All of us friends. Riza and I had started talking me. She was in my gym class and we had some psycho teacher named Armstrong. He worked us really hard today. We complained about him the whole bus ride and then ended up laughing. I was so ready to have fun after a hard week. Winry stood in front of her mirror and looked at the new outfit she bought. Al smiled appreciatively at her. I chuckled at that and then went to find Auntie Pinako. She sat on the porch smiling at the sky. Her pipe was smoking again. She was probably thinking about her son and daughter in law who had died years before. People always told me time heals all wounds but I have a hard time believing it when I look at the old lady. Sometimes I still hear Winry crying and I feel broken for her also. She is my best friend after all.

We all sat to eat dinner later on. I smiled when Auntie Pinako asked how we liked it here. Al looked up and answered with some long explanation about it. When she looked at me I took a breath.

" There are no words good enough to describe how it feels. I am grateful for everything," I closed my eyes gently leaning back in my chair.

All three of them smiled at me and for once I felt that all this love and happiness would consume me. I didn't mind though. After dinner we cleaned the kitchen and I did the dishes. It ended in a three way dish towel fight. Winry won in the end. Al got beaten up and I surrendered. We got ready for the movies and I smiled as I combed my hair and then let it fall in my face. It was seven when we were picked up to walk. Roy and I stayed behind everyone else holding hands. His arms slipped around me and we walked together. Roy rested his chin on my head. I smiled at how perfect it was. His lips brushed the top of my head. I was lucky for this. When we were at the movies we saw the others. It was a big group of hugging and high fives. Tickets were brought and we filed into the theater. Roy sat next to me and Riza sat on my other side. I watched as Havoc hesitantly went to take her hand. She smiled and put her hand in his before he could reach her. Havoc settled next to her and grinned. I smiled as Roy put his arm around me and I cuddled his side. We watched the movie in silence. Roy's breathing had set the rhythm of my beating heart. It was so perfect. I use that word a lot lately. It is ironic that out of all this grief I found love. Honest to goodness love. Once in a lifetime love. Roy rested his cheek on my hair and smiled at the screen.

We had left the theater after the movie and decided to go hang out at a fast food place or something. We pooled our left over money and got ice cream. This time Roy pulled me onto his lap. I sat awkwardly blushing the whole time. Our crowd of people were noisy. We chatted about everything from School to football to homework. It was fun and I decided we should make this a ritual even if it was just going to a park and talking for a while. I smiled at the thought. I would talk to them about it later. We had all decided to walk home and hang out at Breda's house because it was the biggest one. We were on our way there when Riza and Havoc disappeared. I turned and saw them standing a little away from us. She shivered and he shrugged out of his jacket. She smiled taking it from him. He took her smaller hand into his larger one and began to walk again. I smiled as they both dashed to catch up.

It was fun at Breda's house. We watched a movie and talked some more. Roy and Breda played chess. Breda won and I realized he was smarter than I gave him credit for. Roy graciously accepted defeat and gave his seat up to Feury. Chezka sat in the corner with her nose in a book. She must have been feury's girlfriend or sister. Either way they seemed to be smarter than the rest of us. It was one in the morning and I knew I had to go home. Roy, Winry, Al, and Riza stood. Riza kissed havoc on the cheek and went to give him back his jacket. He told her he'd get it on Monday. She smiled and hugged him. We said goodbye to everyone and left. It was dark and the streets were quiet. In the distance I heard a screech of tires and a deafening crash of metal on metal. I felt my stomach drop and turned to look down the street. I saw lights turn on and people emerge. I began to run toward them.

The scene was a Nasty one. There were two cars. One was vacated, the lady had a small cut on her forehead. The other one had a woman in it. She lifted her head from the airbag and opened her door. She panicked and tried to open the back door. It wouldn't budge.

" My baby is stuck. Help," She screamed.

I panicked too. Roy looked at my face.

" What?" He asked

" The car is leaking gas and It will explode. We have to get him out," I looked back at him.

He nodded and I ran. The women fumbled with the handle. I raised my fist and punched the glass hard. It shattered and cut me. I ignored the pain and blood as I reached in. the child was about seven and I hauled him over the glass carefully. I brought him back to where we were a safe distance away.

" Wait. My house keys," The lady went to go back.

I grabbed her shoulder as the car exploded. I ducked while shielding her. Glass bit into my back and scraps of metal flew around us. She looked up at me with wide eyes. The pain must have been evident on my face but I didn't cry out. When I stood and we went back Roy looked at me.

" He's not breathing," he looked at the boy.

" No, No, No. He needs C.P.R. Does anyone know how to do it?" The woman was frantic.

I nodded and tilted the boys head back a little. I felt his pulse. It was faint but there. His breath was gone when I listened. I pressed on his chest hard for fifteen times. Then I gave him two breaths. I kept frantically attempting. After five minutes he still wasn't responding. The medic touched my shoulder.

" He isn't coming back," he said.

I ignored him and continued what I was doing. I could hear the woman crying. The pain in her sobs. The pain I knew. The medic tried to pull my arm away. I knocked his hand off.

" No, He can't be gone. I won't give up. Not yet!" I cried as tears streamed down my face.

The medic moved back and Roy stepped forward.

" Edward. It's okay. You tried your best," His eyes were sad as he picked me up.

I fought his hold and tried to reach for the child. He was going to make it. I had to help him. Roy carried me to an ambulance to get looked at. I cried and fought but it was no use as he held me. I looked up to see them putting a sheet over the boy. That did it. I kicked as hard as I could. Roy let me of as he felt the pain in his leg. I ran back screaming.

Then I punched the boys chest. I punched him again and felt a shudder under my hands. My eyes went wide. I punched him again and again. His breathing was coming back. Everyone stared in awe at what I was doing. When the boy took a deep shuddering breath his mom screeched in joy. I cried as I picked the boy up and brought him to the medic. There was dirt smeared on my face. I lost a lot of blood from the metal and glass. When I felt the fatigue kicking in I sat on a bed and The medic looked at me. She instructed them to lay me on my stomach and put an IV in me. I fell asleep on the ride there and felt the nightmares coming back.

I sat up in my bed all stitched and fixed. They had to give me a blood transfusion because I had lost so much. The newspaper reporters were lined up to talk to me. Good thing Winry and Riza were there to keep them away. They either were injured or to afraid to come near me. I tell you girls who carry tools are dangerous. I was reading a book that Al had brought me from the gift shop when she came in. The woman stopped at the foot of my bed. Her eyes were glassy with tears and I saw more threaten to spill. She came around and hugged me gently.

" Thank you so much. Without you I would have lost my baby boy. I owe you so much," She cried and I felt tears sting my eyes.

" It was just something I had to do," I replied and she let me go.

It was like she saw an angel before her. She told me if I ever needed anything that I could come to her. I smiled before she left. I fell asleep after a while. When I woke up I heard someone move next to me.

" Ah, You're awake my little hero," Roy grinned at me.

" So I'm forgiven for kicking you?" I asked.

" I think saving someone else's life is worth more than my leg being bruised," He chuckled.

I smiled and he climbed into the bed next to me. His arms surrounded me tightly and I got lost in the embrace. My eyes were wet again, Tears slid down my face. Roy held me tighter and whispered in my ear.

" You did a good thing, Edward. I understand why you needed to save him and I love you for it. Please forgive me for trying to stop you," He kissed my hair again.

Instead of answering him I pulled his hand up to my lips and kissed his hand. He smiled at me and I melted. People also say there is a calm before the storm, It's funny but I prefer the calm peacefulness after the storm.


	6. A Meaning for Life in Lies

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 6: A Meaning for Life in Lies

Disclaimer: I own nothing including songs which I do plan on putting one in here soon.

It had been a few days since the accident. I smiled at the thought of home. These stark white walls were blinding. If it weren't for Roy I would have died of boredom. He was the one who visited the most. Reporters wanted to speak with the small home town hero. Winry and Riza still kept them away when they could. I had to laugh as the injuries piled up. The hospital didn't mind, More money more patients.

I smiled as Roy helped me out of my wheel chair and into Auntie Pinako's car. I hated the chair and only had to use it to leave. They charge you for that too. Hospitals take you for all you've got. My smile faltered as I saw the mother carrying her little boy to the car. That contact between a mother and her son. It made me remember my mother. I felt as if I was drowning suddenly. My eyes wouldn't tear away from the sight of them walking. The way she smiled at him, as if he was her world. At that moment I didn't care that I was an adolescent or a boy. I wanted to scream for my mother like when I used to fall and get scrapes. Swallowing, I finally managed to look away from it. Envying other people didn't change the way life was. Roy patted my hair gently and pulled me against him. I sighed and fell into the warm embrace. It was comforting.

" Keep him out here for a second Roy," Auntie Pinako.

" Got it," He replied hugging me still.

Auntie Pinako went inside. Roy looked down at me with a sad look in his eyes.

" What's wrong?" I asked him.

" Nothing really. It's just that, well, I never really felt as helpless as that night. When I thought you could die from all that. I just wanted to protect you and I couldn't even do that. I just froze," Roy looked down.

" Hey you did your best. I have no intention of leaving you anyway," I grabbed his chin and stared in his eyes.

He smirked as he got the idea. We moved closer but then Al knocked on my window.

" Auntie Pinako says you can come in now," He stated.

" Coming," I grumbled.

I climbed out of the car and stood. My legs were shaky seeing as I had been in a hospital bed for about four or five days. I sighed at the thought of make-up work for my absences. Silently I walked in ahead of Roy.

" Surprise!" the room erupted.

I nearly had a heart attack because I wasn't paying attention and didn't see them. Now that I looked I saw Cain, Chiezka, Riza, Winry, Al, Breda, and Havoc. Some of my teachers were there also. While scanning the crowd I saw someone and had to do a double take, No It couldn't be! There he stood like he used to years ago. As if no time had passed. There stood my father, Hohenheim. I felt as if my head was spinning with shock and was trying hard to stay standing. I smiled pulling myself together.

" Wow," I whispered.

I was pulled into a giant hug as all of my friends crowded around me. I was aware of all of them laughing and I felt peacefully at home. Even in a gigantic mass of chaos. I talked to my teachers that were there and they gave me a free pass for being a hero. Armstrong even let me out of my physicals, for which Riza glared at me. I told her I'd work on him for her. She smiled at me for that. We had fun talking and fooling around. Some of them got me presents too. Breda gave me a football and said we'd all play one day. He also said I'd probably get my ass kicked by Winry. He did! Riza and Winry got me a tool kit. They think so alike it's scary. Havoc didn't get me a present but instead told me that he'd pay for my movie ticket or something. I told him it was okay I didn't need anything. Chiezka handed me a book. I read the title and thanked her. Cain gave me a free pass on chemistry homework for one night. I laughed and said thanks. Al got me a book also. He said it was special and later I would find out why. Roy's present was the best of all. He gave it to me when they were leaving.

My teachers had left and my friends were clearing out also. It was a school night. Riza was staying over so she and Winry had gone to get ready for bed. Al had gone to help Pinako and Hohenheim clean up. I bitterly thought Hohenheim's name. Roy pulled me aside.

" I haven't given you your present yet," He smirked.

I held out my hands and he chuckled. Before I understood he yanked me forward by my sleeve and pulled me into a mind blowing kiss. When he pulled away I blushed heavily. He smiled.

" Best present ever," I pulled him back down by his collar.

He smiled into the kiss. My hands fisted in his shirt and his hands wandered to my hips. Someone cleared their throat. We jumped apart as Winry and Riza eyed us.

" Get a room," Winry smiled.

" Okay," I smiled and lead Roy to her room.

" Not my room," She shrieked.

I laughed and said I was just kidding. She sighed in relief while Riza was rolling on the floor laughing. Winry pulled her into her room by the arm.

" Where were we?" Roy asked leaning down.

" Right about he...," I began when Al interuppted.

" Brother, Auntie Pinako and dad would like to talk to you," Al said.

I looked at Roy and went to go back downstairs. He followed. I pulled a chair out from the table and sat. Roy stood behind me. Dad sat across from me.

" Ed," he sighed.

I remained silent and aware as Auntie Pinako set down tea for us to drink. Roy accepted his while standing.

" There is a lot of things we need to speak about," He said as Al sat down next to me.

" Like what?" I shifted in my chair.

The hardness of the chair was uncomfortable against my bruises. Roy seemed to notice he pulled me up and sat. Then proceeded to pull me on his lap. I blushed as my dad looked at me.

" It's time you boys find out why I really left," He announced.

" What do you mean?" Al asked.

" A little after you were born, Al, Your mother got sick with a disease. It was little known. I watched her suffer for a year before breaking. My heart shattered with every coughing fit she had. I decided to go find her some medication from somewhere else. I never told anybody except Pinako here. I left half my money here with you and promised myself I wouldn't come back until I had something. There were nights when I wanted to give up because I missed my boys and my love so much but that kept me going a little longer. Pinako wrote me that Trisha died a little while ago and I didn't want to believe it. I came home to the only thing I have left, You. You can hate me, Curse me, Tell me to leave. Just know I left to save her not because I didn't love you or her. You were, are, and will always be my life," He told us as tears began to form in his eyes.

I stared at him and then stood. I slowly walked over to the man I hadn't seen in years and did something I never thought I would. I hugged him. I hugged him and buried my head in his shoulder. I felt Al next to me hugging him also. Dad hugged back fiercely.

" Where are you staying, Mr. Elric?" Roy asked.

" Here. On the couch for now," Dad answered.

" Oh," I looked at his haggard face.

" I'll find a place of my own where you can visit because I won't pull you from another home," He smiled.

I nodded thankfully and hugged him again.

" Well, I'm off to bed," I beckoned Roy.

He followed me upstairs and helped me change because it was hard for me to move. I smiled as his fingers brushed against my bar stomach. He explored my body, letting his fingetips ghosting over my chest and the bumps and bruises on my back gently. His fingers touched my cheek before he pulled me into a kiss. It was a gentle kiss. Then he pulled my shirt on for me. I pulled at my pants but he pushed my hand away. He pulled them down and let the shirt fall to my knees. He reached up and tugged my underwear down. He quickly pulled another pair on without even looking at me. Then he pulled a pair of pants up on me. I blushed at the contact. He picked me up when I wasn't expecting it and carried me to my bed. He lay me down on the sheets and pulled the covers up around me. I smiled sleepily finally feeling todays events. His lips touched mine and he pulled back. I smiled and shut my eyes.

" I'll see you before school tomorrow," Roy said.

" Goodnight, Roy," I smiled.

I watched him begin to leave and then he stopped. He turned and hesitantly looked at me.

" I love you Edward," He confessed.

Those three words made my heart stop. I looked at him and he looked down.

" I love you too Roy," I smiled.

He looked up and his eyes had tears in them. He meant it. He really meant he loved me. I almost cried too. He walked back to me and bent over me. His lips fell on mine and he held my hand in his. I shut my eyes and kissed him back. It was gentle and loving.

" Don't ever leave me," I whispered to him.

" I couldn't if I wanted to," He climbed on the bed next to me.

I pushed my body into his and fell asleep. All that was Roy surrounded me. His scent and his breathing. His arms around me tightly. I felt safe and loved. He breathed against my neck as he put his head on my chest. I looked down at him and shut my eyes again.

" I love you," he breathed against my neck.

" Love you too," I said again.

He kissed my neck gently and shut his eyes too. I fell asleep in his arms. We were both looking for the meaning for life in lies.


	7. Karaoke Night

New School, New Life, New feelings

Chapter 7: Karaoke Night.

Disclaimer: Well you've seen previous chapters so...

A/N... Humor ensues and we see Chiezka's inner diva Need I say more?

It was once again Friday. I had missed a week of school but Auntie Pinako agreed to let Roy take me out. This was only because she was tired of seeing me mope at losing chess to dad. We were walking to the club when Breda drove up to us in his new car. He offered Roy and I a ride there because we were all late. We arrived and sat with the gang. Soda was ordered and we began the routine of joking around.

After a while a man came out and announced tonight was the clubs Karaoke night. He asked if anyone wanted to go first. No one raised there hand so a spotlight started moving. After two long minutes it landed... On Chiezka. She blushed and squeaked.

" Come on," Winry pushed her a little.

Winry told the D.J. What to play. She told him how Chiezka needed to loosen up. He smirked and looked at the blushing girl who wore a miniskirt and a tank top. Apparently she was Barbie doll for the other girls tonight. The song began and I recognized it from the radio's. Chiezka screwed her eyes shut and listened for her entrance.

" Remember the feelings. Remember the day. My stone heart was breaking. My love ran away," she began.

Her eyes opened against the spotlight and she smirked at Winry who smiled back. I missed what the communication was.

" This moment I knew I would be someone else. My love turned around and I fell," She smiled and I'll be damned strutted out to the floor.

She stopped in front of one of the men there. Chiezka put her hand to his cheek then pulled it away.

" Be my bad boy, Be my man. Be my weekend lover but don't be my friend," She placed her finger on his lips.

" You can be my bad boy but understand that I don't need you in my life again. Won't you be my bad boy, be my man. Be my weekend lover but don't be my friend. You can be my bad boy but understand That I don't need you again. No I don't need you again," Chiezka pulled away and wrapped herself in another man's arms.

" bad boy!" She shook her head.

" You once made this promise to stay by my side. But after some time you just pushed me aside. You never thought that a girl could be strong. Now I'll show you how to go on," She smirked at him.

The man smiled when Chiezka placed her hand on his chest. Then she pushed him back away from her.

" Be my bad boy, Be my man. Be my weekend lover but don't be my friend. You can be my bad boy but understand that I don't need you in my life again. Won't you be my bad boy, be my man. Be my weekend lover but don't be my friend. You can be my bad boy but understand That I don't need you again. No I don't need you again," She finished by pulling Cain up by his collar and pushing her lips onto his hotly.

" It worked," Winry slapped Riza's hand.

Who knew the girl had it in her to do that. I smiled as she dropped the mic with an all to innocent face. Cain was tomato red and Chiezka looked at her feet. It was as if all of us were holding our breath before he reached up and cupped her cheek. He kissed her gently on the lips and we all cheered. So much for an innocent night of fun. I smiled as Winry looked at me because of course I was the genius who came up with the plan.

" payback," Chiezka pointed at Winry.

She told the D.J. To play a song by some girl band. Winry had fun kicking it up on stage and Playing air guitar. She was just that kind of chick. Not to mention she got Riza up there with her. When calls came out again Roy walked out to the floor. How brave and I knew he was going to sing some sappy love song. It's who he was. How I was wrong.

A soft guitar played and then turned into a loud drum and electric guitar melody. He was singing a song I never heard him listen to. It was my favorite song when I met him. The song was called all that I've got by The used. His voice carried sounding exactly like the guy who actually sings the song. I smiled as he looked right at me. I knew I owe him big for everything. So of course I was next.

When he finished a roar of applause met his ears. He smirked and looked back at me.

" Emo much?" I joked when he sat next to me.

He laughed but I stood and he gave me a look. I wanted to sing A song called Rewind by The pillars. When the melody started I swayed and began to sing. It was haunted and Roy knew I was trying to say something to him. He knew in my eyes that I meant to say thanks and that this was what I would do for him. He looked at the floor and for the first time I could have sworn I saw a tear form and slide down his face. He wouldn't look at me as I continued. I felt as if I did something wrong but all eyes were on me except the ones I wanted. I closed my eyes for a moment and then I felt it. The warmth of a body pressed against me. I felt arms pulling me closer and I kept singing. My eyes stayed shut as I breathed in and out while the song ended. I was aware of people watching as a cheek lay on my hair. I new it was Roy and this was his way of saying he understood. He accepted what I was saying. I smiled as he held me tighter and people cheered again.

His tears wet my hair and I felt like I was needed when I returned the embrace. He kissed me hair and I felt my stomach muscles clench. I knew I did something wrong then. He never kissed my hair unless I was leaving for somewhere. It clicked the way he was holding me, the way he kissed my hair, why he was crying. He was thinking about that night and what had happened. He thought I was mad at him or hated him. I looked up into his eyes and kissed his lips with reckless abandon. He gasped and I pulled back.

" Get it now?" I asked.

" Yeah," He smiled sweetly.

I took his hand and returned to our seat. It was chatty at our table. Havoc and Riza were talking about an upcoming dance. Winry and Al were reminiscing. Chiezka and Cain were makingo ut. They waste no time. Breda was eyeing this girl across the place. Roy squeezed my hand and pulled me against me.

" I can't let you go. Everything feels so right and I need you now," Roy sighed.

" What's wrong?" I was worried.

" We can talk later. At your house tonight," He smiled.

" Sure," I leaned against him.

His lips rested on my hair again and then he looked up. A girl winked at him and he just looked at me. I scowled at her. I think she got the message. Roy held me tighter against him and chuckled in my ear. Oh My Gosh. It was so sexy when he did that. I did not just think that. Wow! So much for innocent indeed.

Later that night Roy and I sat in my room. I turned music on my computer. He leaned against the back of my bed and closed his eyes. I sat next to him and took a lock of his hair in between my fingers. It was soft and tickled my hand. He sighed happily and smiled.

" Ed, My parents are getting a divorce. They have been fighting for a long time. That's not all. The other night they were arguing loudly and I heard. I went to the kitchen to see and watched my dad. My mom was crying and he... he slapped her so hard she fell," Roy was crying again.

I hugged him closely trying to comfort him. His hands snapped up to my arms. He gripped them and held onto me.

" He hit her like she was nothing and it scared me. I've been thinking what if I ever hit you. I couldn't live with myself if I turned out like him. And, and ,and," He stuttered and tried to breath.

" Roy, relax. You are not your father. I trust you completely and I know you'd never hurt me," I held him.

He buried his head into my stomach and cried. I held him closely and felt tears slide down my face. How could I not know? How could I not see he was in pain? He looked up at me and then kissed me fiercely. Roy pressed his lips into mine. He ran his tongue along my bottom lip. Taking the hint I opened my mouth and let him in. He explored my mouth hungrily. I moaned which pushed him farther. He pressed every line of his body into mine and kissed me ravenously. Oh It was sweet torture, What he was doing. I moaned again and he pulled away. His body hovered over mine. Roy was sexier than ever. His hair clung to his forehead from sweat and his eyes were full of lust and love. I pouted at the loss of him against me. He smiled and then went back to attacking me with his lips. I can't say I minded. His lips pressed against my neck. I wanted him to keep going. It felt like heaven but he pulled away and kissed me gently on the lips. I smiled as he settled next to me and held me until I fell asleep again.

Karaoke night. I thanksthe heavens for that!


	8. Losing Myself in Him

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 8: Losing Myself in Him.

Disclaimer: Same old Same old.

A/n There is smut in this chapter. So yeah. If you would rather skip this and ask for an edited version message me.

My eyes blurred as I woke up. I wasn't familiar with the settings around me. It didn't look like my room. I realized that what I was seeing wasn't my room. It was Roy's jacket, which just happened to be on his body. I blushed as I remembered the heated kisses last night. Roy's hand rested on my hip keeping me close to him. He grunted a little and shifted. I felt a jolt as his hand slipped down my front. Oh no, apparently all of me was awake now. I needed a cold shower or two, Or a hundred. I tried to move but he pulled me close again and snuggled against me. Why me?

Resistance was futile as I tried to pull away again. My phone vibrated in my pocket. I reached in and answered it.

" Lo," I mumbled sleepily.

" Hey, Ed. I just wanted to let you know that Grandma took me and Al out for lunch and shopping. Also your dad is job hunting," Winry informed me.

I was alone in the house with Roy. I tried not to let my mind wander less I need tissues and a cold shower. I told her okay and I would call back later. She laughed and hung up. For all I knew she and Al planned this. I would kill them if they did. Roy stirred next to me. He yawned and stretched finally waking up. Wait he was waking up and I was in this condition. Oh Shiz.

Great Now I have no idea how to get out of this. He looked at me through bleary eyes and smiled. A surge of pain went through my groin as it was now painfully hard. I pulled back and stood. It was hard to walk.

" Where you going?" he asked.

" Shower," I mumbled.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me back down. I fought and he looked at me oddly. Being a boy it didn't take long before he caught on to what was bothering me. Roy smirked and let his hand fall. I went to get up but he stood and wrapped his arms around me from behind. What was he doing? I panicked.

" Shh," he whispered.

I felt his hand slip down my side and past my waist. I realized where he was heading and my eyes grew wide. His one hand stayed on my chest. I was about to move when he reached his destination. His hand closed around my erection through my pants. I moaned as his hand and the fabric rubbed against me. Glorious pleasure swept through me as he continued. It wasn't long before I exploded with stars in my eyes. My body felt week as I slumped against him. I was plastered in sweat and my own fluids. I really needed a shower now. Roy smiled at me and I blushed.

" See, all better," he smirked.

" I ... I ... Umm. Shower," I managed.

I raced to the bathroom and shut the door behind me. I was sticky and felt dirty but it felt so good. The hot water ran over my body and I relaxed into it. Roy hadn't thought twice about that. He just slipped his hand onto me and. I shuddered as I remembered and felt pleasure at the mere thought. The moans that escaped me. Who knew I could sound like that? I was completely putty in his hands. It was like I needed him to do that to me. It was way better than my hand. Wait I should edit my thoughts because I swear Winry can read minds. I smiled as the soap bubbled against my bare skin.

" Ed. Are you drowning. It's been a half an hour," Roy asked through the door.

" Ha ha I am alive you idiot," I yelled back.

He chuckled at me. Then went back to the other room. I finished and shut the water. I wrapped a towel around myself. It was cold out of the bathroom. I walked to my room to see Roy lying on the bed again. He had a book in his hand.

" This is interesting," He said.

" What is that?" I asked as I got clothes to wear.

" The book Al gave you. It looks like a bunch of kid stories," He answered.

" Let me see. Oh this is a book of fairy tales my mom... used to read me," I said slowly.

I realized why it was important now. It was a memory for us. One we could cling to when we missed her. The books shook in my hands and a photo fell out. It was a picture of mom and I scooped it up.

" She's beautiful," Roy said looking over my shoulder.

" Yeah. One of the most beautiful women I've ever known. She was the best mom ever. Or at least she tried to be even when she was sick," I sighed at the memories.

Roy put his arms around me and held me close to him. I smiled at the love and warmth in him. We fell back onto my bed and he took the book. He started reading to me while he held me. I nuzzled his neck and smiled. Within minutes I was lost in his voice. The deep sound wrapping around me. Smothering me until I felt like it was all that was left. I felt oddly comfortable though. Roy sighed gently when he finished the story and put the book down. He kissed my forehead and looked down at me. I giggled under his gaze and blushed. I knew he loved me but when he said it again I felt as if I would melt into him. He kissed my lips gently again.

I felt a rush as the kiss deepened and his tongue danced around mine. My eyes slid shut and placed my arms around his neck. My eyes shot open as his erection brushed me. I gasped at the contact of him. He held my waist down with his hands. Roy gently bit my lip and I gasped again. At this rate I wouldn't be able to breath again soon. Our bodies mixed together and with every simple touch I felt an electric bolt of pleasure run through me.

He looked at me eyes pleading. I nodded understanding the question. His lips returned to mine as his hand slipped under my shirt. He rubbed against my nipple gently and I moaned into his kiss. Then Roy moved down to my neck. He bruised it with his kisses. Marking me as his. I moaned as he drove me insane. He slipped my shirt up over my head. His lips moved over my chest to my nipples. They were fully erect as his lips settled over one. I moaned and my breathing became even more harsh. His hand wandered down tracing my stomach and then his hands slipped into my pants. He encased me and began to pump slowly. I wanted more and thrusted into his hand. He smirked and pulled his hands out. Then his fingers went for my pants button. He pulled them down with my boxers completely exposing me. I felt the cold air hit me. Roy's shirt was lost someone in my room. His pants were unbuttoned. I felt like I was screaming inside my head. I wanted more. More pleasure. He was so addicting. He closed his hand around me again and began to pump slowly. I squirmed underneath him. My stomach tingled. He kissed my stomach again and smiled. Roy smeared my precum on his finger and then did something never expected. He stuck it in a very awkward place. It felt odd at first. But as he moved i got used to it. He added another finger and it began to hurt again. Then again I got used to it. He added a third finger and then began to move in and out. It hurt until he hit a spot. I don't know how but i was like a flash of white in my eyes. He smirked and pulled the fingers out. No Fair. I wanted more. He then put himself inside of me. I moaned out loud as he hit the spot again. Slowly he built up a rhythm between his thrusts and his hand. I was about to explode. My body arched towards his. I came with a loud cry of his name. He followed soon after with a whisper of my name. Then he collapsed on me. We lay panting, sweating, and naked on my bed.

This was all new to me. I felt so tired that I fell asleep in Roy's arms again. He tucked me closer to him and I smelt the sweat and sex in the air. Oh wow that was something I never thought I'd do.

(A/n I know it's not great and all but remember it is from the point of a sixteen year old boy who is about as experienced as a nun.)

I woke later and found myself fully dressed in clean clothes and lying on new sheets. Roy was sitting in my computer chair watching me sleep. I'm guessing Roy changed the sheets and my clothes. He also left two Tylenol on the side table.

" Take those before you get up. You are bound to hurt by now," he smiled gently.

"Errrg," I grunted as I tried to move.

" Sorry," He ran his hand through my hair.

" It was worth it," I smirked.

I swallowed the pills and tried to sit up despite my protesting bottom half. He smiled and helped me to sit up. I kissed him gently and thanked him for everything. He smirked at the double meaning. I looked into his eyes and realized I cared for him more than I thought. I was becoming completely lost in him. But I didn't mind at all.


	9. Chapter 9

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 9: Fixing Roy

Disclaimer: Same as always...

" Ed?" Roy looked down at me.

" Mhmmm," I answered nuzzling his neck.

" Will you come with me to dinner at my house tonight?" He asked.

" If you tell me where you learned to have sex. I know I can't be your first. No one is that good right off the bat," I looked in his eyes.

" I had other boyfriends you know. The only one I slept with was James. He was kind and caring. I loved him with all of my foolish fifteen year old heart," Roy smiled as he remembered.

" What happened to him?" I was curious even though I felt that pang of jealously towards him.

" He died. In A fire. After that I tried to keep going and learned a lot about myself," He sighed.

" Do you love me like you loved him," I cringed at how naïve I sounded.

" No, I love you so much more," He tugged me up so I was in his arms.

"I'll go with you anywhere you need me," I smiled at me.

Roy smiled and held me. My bottom still hurt even two hours later. We sat on the couch watching T.V. Winry and the others were still out. Dad came home for lunch and left again. I sat with my back against Roy's chest. He had his arms wrapped tightly around my waist.

Soon it was time for Roy to be home for dinner. He held my hand as he led me there. Even when he opened the door. Riza greeted me in a hug and then they led me inside.

" Oh, Roy, You're home. Good," A woman with a soft face smiled at him.

" Yeah mom. How are you?" Roy frowned at the bruise on her left cheek.

" Fine," She smiled still.

He sighed and then she noticed.

" Is this Ed?" She asked.

" Yeah," Roy smiled.

" Oh so nice to meet you dear. Roy told me all about you and you are every bit as charming as he said," She shook my hand.

I grinned and shook her hand too. She was good natured I could tell.

" Roy? Oh it is you. Who's your friend?" A gruff voice sounded behind us.

Roy scowled and his mother jumped and squeaked. She scurried back to her pot. Riza frowned at me and I smiled sympathetically. She stepped closer to me as if I gave her comfort. I put my hand on her shoulder and smiled. It was time to sit down. We gathered around the table and I smiled shyly.

" So who is this?" Mr. Mustang asked.

" This Is Ed," Roy said.

" Oh is he another little one of your Homo's?" Mr. Mustang scowled.

" He's my boyfriend," Roy said bitterly.

" Honey, Stop calling him a homo," Mrs. Mustang smiled.

" Don't tell what to do," Mr. Mustang growled.

Roy's eyes got wide. Mrs. Mustang scrambled back as Mr. Mustang raised his hand. He struck her quickly. Roy looked at him and I pulled Riza behind me. He raised his hand again.

" Bitch. You nag me all day then order me around. I don't like that," He yelled.

" Dad. Stop!" Roy shouted.

He stepped in front of his mother. The fist connected with his cheek bone. I heard the sound of his jaw popping. Roy's eyes screwed up in pain.

" move you fucking homo. I hate you and that stupid bitch behind you. You both need to learn your place," The man growled.

He went to hit Roy again. I panicked and looked around. I grabbed the pot from the stove and hit him. I swung it really hard and hit his head. I watched as the man fell forward. Riza was already by her mom putting ice on the swollen bruise. I looked at Roy as he popped his jaw back into place. I smiled at him but saw the tears in his eyes. Riza dialed 911 and reported it. I watched as Roy backed against the wall and slid down it. He put his head in his hands and cried. I crouched next to him and put my arms around him. He looked up at me and grabbed me. I smiled gently and tried to comfort him. The police had to ask us questions and stuff like that. I hugged Riza until Winry and Al got there. They didn't ask what happened just hugged her. Auntie Pinako took care of Mrs. Mustang. I waited for Roy. He came out and ran his hand through his hair. I put my arms around his stomach and held him. He put his arms around my shoulders and held me close to him.

" I'm sorry," he murmured

" It's not your fault," I mumbled in his shirt.

He held me close to him for a few more minutes before a medic wanted to check him. His father was being pulled by handcuffs. He looked right at me and I suppressed a shiver from his cold glare. Roy sat staring at me from the ambulance. I looked at the disaster in his house. The table had been overturned and there was food from the pot lay on the floor. I felt tears well in my eyes. Roy needed me now and I had to be strong for him.

Silently we both went into his room. It was a nice room. It was painted black with white writing on it. He had a bed in the corner. It was neat and basic. He pulled me to him again and ran his hand through my hair. I let him do it because he need it right now. I felt his hands grab my hands and he looked at me. His eyes were sad and the normal spark was gone. I took him into my arms again and held him. It wasn't awkward when he sat so I could reach his neck comfortably.

" I Love you, Roy. You did a good thing. I'm glad for who you are. Don't blame yourself. Tonight I will take care of you. You've done so much for and I owe you. Plus you need me and I want to be there for you," I sighed against his hair.

" Stay with me," Roy demanded silently.

" I will. I promise," I smiled.

" Promises are broken easily," Roy looked down," Prove you'll stay."

I sat in his lap and let him put his arms around me. He kissed me gently on my head and held me. He stroked my cheek and told me he loved me. He whispered it over and over in my ears. Against my neck. Against my hair. He whispered it as he held me against him. Roy didn't only say it, he proved it with every gentle touch, with every tear and every kiss. I smiled as he pulled at my shirt. He didn't want sex or power. No, He wanted contact. He wanted to feel human. I wanted to give him that. With every grunt and moan and sigh and shake. It was like an unspoken I love you. I live for you. I gave him all of me to help him.

" I love you," He sighed as he collapsed on me for the second time that day.

This time I held him as he slept. He was beautiful like an angel. I kissed his dark hair and smiled. His breath came out and brushed my chest which was bare underneath him. I smiled at the small tickle. The tiny bit of proof he was alive.

" I love you too," I shut my eyes.

This was all he need. Everything it took to help him. This was fixing Roy.


	10. Chapter 10

New School. New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 10: Standing on the Edge of Everything I've Never Felt

Disclaimer: I should just refresh everyone's mind to the fact that I sadly own nothing of FMA or Any music put in here.

A/n: I realize I haven't thanked any of my reviewers or readers. I apologize for seeming snobbish and all. Thank you for taking time out of busy schedules and all that to read my story. It means a lot to me that you like it. And now on to the story...

I woke up feeling oddly cold. It was around five on Monday morning. I was going back to school today. Silently I stood and looked around. I was back in my room alone. I'm guessing Roy brought me here. I couldn't sleep again so instead I decided to get ready for school. I brushed through my hair while looking in the mirror. I saw someone different than I was a few weeks ago. Then I hadn't even known I was gay. Now I was in a relationship with Roy Mustang. He was like my other half. I needed him in order to live. This was new to me. I had never needed anyone like that.. Not even mom! Now it was like I was a different person completely and everyone was so accepting of it. I'm not even sure why I started liking Roy. Maybe it was his smile, or his voice. Maybe his infectious care for me. I felt it right away. As if he had waited for me and finally found everything he had searched for. I had never felt that way about a girl let alone a boy. Now all of the sudden my universe revolved around my boyfriend of about a month. I stared deeper into the reflection of my golden eyes. They was something I hadn't known. Maybe t was me healing. I was broken when we came here, as was Al. Maybe now we were becoming better. Learning we could keep going without her.

I realize that people may be forgotten after death but that the ones who loved them never truly forget. She's still alive in me. My thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of my cellphone.

" Hello," I answered it.

" Ed, It's me Riza. I stole your number from Roy. Can I come over for a little to talk?" She asked.

" What about school?" I retorted unsure about time.

" Ed look out your window," She giggled.

I went to my window and looked out. Instinctively I look into Roy's window and saw him sleeping.

" Stop molesting my brother with your eyes and look down," She laughed.

I blushed and was about to ask how she saw me when I looked down. She was standing in show that came up to her knees.

" Apparently there is no school today or tomorrow for that matter seeing as it is still snowing," She sighed.

" Come around to my other window and I'll throw down the ladder," I stated.

" Ladder?" she asked.

" Long story. Just do it," I ordered.

I threw the ladder out the window and she climbed up it. I helped her in and she smiled as her feet hit the ground. I pulled the ladder in and shut the window.

" I guess I should have told you I don't like heights," Riza looked at me.

" Wait here and I'll get some food. Put your wet stuff on the heater. You can borrow a pair of pants from my top draw," I smiled and disappeared.

She shut the door to change. Silently I bustled around the kitchen and gathered a whole bunch of snack food that we probably shouldn't eat in the morning and some juices. Riza came down to help me bring it up.

" Oh you got the good stuff," She smiled at the food.

I grinned and nodded. We shut my door behind us and settled on my bed. Riza looked down and then sighed.

" Ed, I just wanted to say thanks for yesterday. I'm really sorry. No one should have to see that. It was really messing Roy up and I'm glad you helped him. I just have this feeling he'll need you more than anyone," She shut her eyes.

I hugged her gently and she returned it. It was warm like the hugs Winry gives me. The sisterly ones that make you feel happy. I smiled as I thought how attached I was to all these people. I was lucky.

" Hey, It's no problem. I want to help Roy. Believe it or not I love him so much. He really is so important to me," I smiled.

" I know. that's why I can count on you. I know that he's in good hands," She looked tearful.

" Riza, What are you not telling I am here for you to so don't think I won't help you," I looked at her.

" I... I... Oh Ed, It's just that. I', not sure how much more I can take. It seems like I'm useless compared to him. People see us and they see Roy and his little sister. They don't see Riza. Now that mom is hurt and I couldn't help it's taken it's toll on him. Everyone will want to help him and no one will really want to help me. The only one he wants is you Ed. Yet he'll get calls from people and flowers and cards," She sounded ashamed of herself.

" Riza," I sighed.

" I just feel like I am breaking and who will pick up my pieces? Who will fix me? I hat e how selfish it sounds but I need someone too," She cried out.

I placed and arm around her shoulder and held her. She snuggled against me.

" Riza. Winry, Al, Roy, Havoc, Breda, Cain, Chiezka, Even that man Hughes care for you. I care for you too. We have so many good memories together, all of us. I bet you that when they find out they will all try to cheer you up just like Al and Winry did today. Riza we all love you," I hugged her.

She sniffled and grabbed a cookie. I smiled and took that as a sign she was okay. We sat and ate from the snacks. It was like a real sleepover with friends. We watched T.V. For an hour and then went downstairs. Al and Winry sat at the table with the phone.

" We're calling everyone for a snowball fight," Al smiled.

Winry stood and came around the table. She looked at me and Riza and then put an arm around each of our necks. I knew why and so did Riza. We leaned into the embrace. It was her way of comforting us after what happened.

" I'm talking to Roy," she smiled.

Riza sat next to Al and he hugged her too. I gave her an "I told you" look. She smiled and started talking to him. I gathered my shoes and went outside. My body was cold seeing as I was wearing my pajamas. That thought just registered and I blushed as I realized what that meant. Roy had changed me. I made my way across the street and knocked on his door. He opened it with a quizzical look at me. I walked past him and into his room. I went straight to his closet and pulled out a jacket. He smiled at me.

" Hey shrimp. I was just talking to Winry," He smiled.

I ignored the shrimp comment and went to him. I placed my arms around his chest and put my face in his neck. He hesitated and then put his arms around my shoulders. I inhaled taking in his scent. It was sweet and overwhelming. I held back tears as i held him tightly. He patted my head and smiled when I looked up at him.

" I missed you too," he smirked.

Instead of commenting I reached up and kissed him. It was gentle as his lips moved against mine. It was a simple I love you kiss. The words didn't need to be said.

" You must be freezing," he pulled me to his bed and pulled the blanket on me.

I shivered but tried to hide it. He smiled and put his arms around me.

" Hey, Shrimp?" He asked.

" Yes, Bastard," I smirked.

" I love you," He sighed.

" I love you too," I smiled.

He kissed me again and moved me so I was straddling him. His lips captured mine as his heart held mine captive. I smiled against his lips and closed my eyes giving myself over to the feelings running through me. I was standing on the edge of everything I've never felt.


	11. Chapter 11

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 11: I Just Need To Think

Disclaimer: I own nothing but an Idea. Hmmm... maybe I will run for president

Roy sat across the table staring at me. He blinked a few times and then resumed his watchful post. I smiled and sipped my tea.

" Where are they?" Winry growled anxious to go out and play.

" They'll be here soon," Riza smiled at Winry stomping her foot.

" They're an hour late. What could possibly be keeping them?" She sighed.

Then there was a knock. Winry jumped and ran to answer the door. There stood Chiezka and Cain.

"It's about time...," Winry had notice something was off.

" You've got sex hair, Chiezka," Roy smirked.

She blushed but ignored the comment and walked in. Cain smirked at Roy. Winry dragged them back outside. Now that everyone was here she wanted to have a snowball fight or something. Roy and I stood staring at the clouds. I felt the world was so much bigger when I looked at the sky. I smile and grabbed Roy's hand. He held my hands to warm them because I had no gloves. I smiled at him and surprisingly he blushed. I blushed too and the look on his face was priceless.

" Stop imagining him naked," Al told Roy as he waled past.

Roy blushed even redder than before. He let go of my hand and looked down at his feet. Was he really that sensitive right now? I smiled and looked at him as he stared at the spot on his shoes. Then I jumped at him knocking him over. He fell on his back and I landed on top of him. His blush grew until his face was fully red. I smiled and leaned down. My lips pressed against his lips gently. Just to make him feel better. He closed his eyes and kissed me back. I like submissive Roy too. He's cute where as dominant Roy is just down right sexy. Uh oh my turn to blush. Thank goodness his eyes were shut. He kissed me back his hands grabbed my hips gently. I smiled against his lips. Then we pulled apart.

" Let's make a snowman," I sounded like a child as I took his hand and dragged him up.

He smiled and walked with me to a different part of the lawn. We began to roll snow as the fight went on. So far Winry and Riza were beating everyone else. I watched as Roy began to pile the snow together to make a snowman. I had never actually made one before so I let him show me. He shaped it and then added another layer. It was coming out perfectly.

When we finished I decided to give it my scarf for a finishing touch. I smiled at the fact that it was snowing in November. I remembered how much mom loved the snow early in the fall. Roy held my hand as we looked at the snowman. I decided to name him Hubert. I don't know why though.

The snowball war raged on and eventually we joined. It was fun as I pelted Roy with a snow ball. It hit his back and he turned around and tackled me. I smiled when he stood and helped me stand. Roy and I threw snow at Winry and Riza with the others. However, Through some odd way, Riza and Winry won. It was now getting dark and I sat to watch the stars and snow. It was cold as everyone else filed inside. I sat alone for quite some time before I felt something being wrapped around my neck. I stared as my scarf settled on me. Roy took my hand and sat next to me. My butt was freezing from the cold ground and I felt stiff with the frigid air but I had no intention of moving.

Roy looked at his feet. No matter what he wouldn't look me in the eyes. I didn't know why. We sat just staring at nothing hand in hand. It was peaceful but I sensed something was off. Roy was thinking about yesterday most likely. I didn't want him to remember. Gently I squeezed his hand and then I reached up and cupped his cheek. He smiled but wouldn't look at me. I saw it then the tears coming down his face. I wiped one away as it streamed down his cheek. He shut his eyes as if memorizing my touch. I was getting scared, beginning to panic. He looked so lost and sad. I put my arms around him and held him. I buried my face in the back of his coat and smelled his scent. He leaned into me and I knew what was going to come now. He sighed.

" Ed, I have been thinking. I can't... I can't," His voice cracked.

" What Roy?" I asked covering the panic.

" I need time... I need to think. With everything I'm not sure if I'm ready for this. I don't know if I can be everything you need," He cried.

Roy turned to face me. He stood and pulled me up. His strong arms pulled me into his chest. His tears hit my hair and I began to cry.

" I don't know if I can be what you need. If I can fix you when I can't even fix myself," He sobbed.

I fisted his coat and tried to control myself. He let me go. He smiled lightly and sighed.

" Ed, I'm sorry but I can't be with you anymore. I'm sorry because I do love you. I just need to think," He touched my face.

His fingers ran over my cheeks and nose as if to memorize the way I looked. Then he reached around and his hands ran through my hair. My breath caught in my throat. The tears built up but I fought them. I couldn't bring myself to speak or say I love you too. Gently he leaned down and his lips captured mine. The kiss was short and gentle. A parting gift as the snow swirled around us. Then he pulled away and walked towards his house. He didn't look back.

I opened the front door still fighting tears.

" I'm tired so I'm going to bed. Night everyone," I smiled a fake smile.

" Night," They chorused.

I ran to my room and locked my door. I went to my window and for the first time since I moved I closed the curtains. I cut off all connections to Roy. I huddled in my bed and let the tears fall freely now. I lay gasping for air through broken sobs. It was as if I could feel my heart breaking along the ever so carefully stitched edges. It felt like I was bleeding and it wouldn't stop. I had no one to run to now. My phone rang and I looked at it. The name said Roy but I couldn't answer it. I wasn't going to be okay this time. Somehow I just knew.

A/n okay so this is a time skip of about a month. It is now early December.

I walked the halls of the school silently. It seems I had become more withdrawn. Everyone kept an eye on me waiting for something. I knew what they were expecting but I hadn't decided to try yet. My curtains at home remained closed. The ladder was collecting dust under my bed. I sat quietly next to Havoc in English. He frowned and eyed me with a worried look.

" Ed, Are you okay. You look kind of sick," He asked.

" I'm fine, Havoc. Just a little dizzy," I sighed.

It had been happening a lot lately. Dizziness, Stomach pains. I was losing weight and had stopped eating. My clothes were getting to big. I had lost my spark and my temper was much less dangerous. It was my way of living, I tortured myself. I don't know why it just happened. Auntie Pinako has tried to get me to see a therapist but I refused. My grades dropped steadily and I often cried for no reason. The bell rang and I had once again spaced out for the whole class.

I walked to chemistry letting my feet lead me. Cain sat next to me and sighed. He was going to ask too.

" I'm fine. Don't worry," I lied again.

" Ed, I can't help but worry," He shook his head.

Through it all I leaned on him the most. He listened to me and never judged me or told on me. Instead he would reprimand me and then hug me. He was my best friend. Not the kind who are there when they want to be, No, He was the kind that was always there no matter what. I felt grateful for him. He took an extra set of notes for me and put them in my notebook before class ended.

We walked to math together. I sat in the desk next to him. He and Havoc began talking silently. Probably about me and why I was like this. I didn't even look up when Roy walked in. He was better off than me. He was now in therapy and was beginning to recover. He still smiled and laughed. He rarely had to fake it. I kept my eyes on my notebook. I prayed for the clock t move. Prayed, I never did that. There was no God. He didn't like me and I didn't like him. I never believed and now I prayed daily in that class for it to end faster. When the bell rang they went to lunch. I skipped lunch and spent the time in the library staring at the walls. The librarian never told or anything. She just bustled around like I wasn't there. History and my study period went by fast. I sighed as I walked to gym and changed into my uniform. Riza stood waiting by the door.

We walked to the line together. She didn't bother me or anything but I knew she was worried. I was glad nobody took sides on this. I would be lonely if they had. Havoc and Riza were officially a couple now. It hurt to see them smiling and laughing together. Watching them kiss tore me apart. It was the same with Winry and Al who were also a couple now. Everyone else was paired off and here I was mourning over my first love. My only love. I was young and would probably rebound but I didn't want to. I wanted Roy. I wanted his strong arms and his silent words. I wanted his body to be with mine again and to feel complete with him.

I walked from the bus stop slowly. I was behind everyone else as they chattered on. I felt like I was drowning. Suddenly my head was swimming and my body felt heavy. I couldn't hold myself up. My legs came out from under me and I fell on my knees. This made me drop my bag and books. Everyone turned at the noise of them hitting the ground to see me fall forward onto my arms. I couldn't breath right and my body was shaky. Was I dying? I should be afraid right?

" Ed," Al shouted and that was the last thing I heard before I blacked out.

Even though I was unconscious my mind played one sentence over and over.

" I just need to think."


	12. Chapter 12

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 12: I'm Not Ready to Give You Up

Disclaimer: See the chapters before this.

I woke in a hospital bed. What was I making a habit out of this now? I sighed and watched the I.V. Drip into my arm. I shut my eyes again willing away the fresh wave of dizziness. The doctors had told me I was severely malnourished and that I could've died. They forced me to eat. Even if it was nasty hospital food. I was a good boy and didn't throw it back up. People came to visit me. My friends brought me my work also and brought it back for me. So I was keeping up with school and my teachers were pleased. It looked like I was making everyone happy again. I could get used to this whole living a lie thing.

Al sat next to my bed rarely leaving when he visited. We talked about everything. He smiled and told me all the gossip over the past two days I was gone.

" Oh, and Roy came to visit with someone the other night. Uh oh, I'm sorry," He covered.

" What," My eyes grew wide.

" Roy came to visit and he had his new... friend with him," Al sighed.

" Who was this knew friend," I tried to feign indifference.

" Some boy from our school. I don't remember his name," Al looked at me.

Damn. It felt lie someone was choking me. I sighed and tried to breath.

" Oh well I am happy for him. I'm glad he found someone who could make him happy," I smiled.

Someone who could be everything I couldn't Someone who deserved him. I was going to die now. My heart was tearing into a million more fragments. Al watched me carefully and decided after a moment that I was okay. I continued the conversation.

They were releasing me today so I could finally go home. That's why Al was here during school hours. The ride home was quiet. I was not looking forward to questions and worried looks. Dad helped me up to my room and tucked me in like I was five again. I fell asleep.

It was five when I woke up. I heard voices and decided to go downstairs. Big mistake. There stood Roy talking to Winry. They laughed and smile. He looked so happy and carefree. I watched as the breeze from the open window made his hair flutter. My chest tightened. I was going to sneak back upstairs when I saw him. The boy came up behind Roy and put his arms around him. He kissed the back of Roy's neck and I felt like I was drowning again. The tears welled up in my eyes and just when I turned around...

" Oh, Ed, It's time for you to eat. Come on down," Auntie Pinako said.

I froze. Shit, well it was to late to turn around now. I walked down the stairs with a blank expression on my face. I sat at the table with my food. Instead of eating I pushed it around.

" Ed, You need to eat. If you don't you'll die," Winry sighed sadly.

" I don't care," I mumbled.

" What," her eyes went wide.

" I don't care," I shouted standing up.

" Maybe I should go," Roy announced.

" No I'm going," I shouted again.

With that I ran. I ran out the door into the cold. My feet were bare and I was cold but I kept going. I couldn't stop not until I couldn't be found.

" Ed," They called after me.

I didn't answer. I didn't turn. I just ran until I couldn't keep going. Then I sat on the ground behind a big tree. I was in the park and it was beautiful. I lay down at the base of the tree and let the moonlight fall on me. My skin was unnaturally pale. I could pass for a vampire.

" Ed," Voices called running past where I was.

I didn't answer again. I sighed and let the cold take me. It was a while before I felt warm arms pick me up and hold me.

" Come on. Let's get you home," A voice sighed.

I smelled the smoke on Havoc's coat as he carried me and assured a worried Riza that I was okay. She patted my forehead and held my hand. I was crying. I didn't realize it until she wiped away a tear and smiled. I sobbed then. They wracked my body as Havoc held me tighter. I had no control and it was like I was a child. My emotions ran wild and I couldn't stop crying.

Once we were at my house dad took me. He put me on the couch and covered me with thick blankets. I had stopped crying and just sniffled now. It felt like my eyes had dried up. Winry took my temperature and Riza made me tea. Auntie Pinako spoke to the doctor on the phone. Al held my hand and dad patted my hair. Havoc took off his coat and placed it over the blankets.

" How could you, Roy?" Riza turned on him.

" What?" He asked.

" How could you do this to him. Then bring your new toy over and flaunt him. He is fragile and you hurt him again. Maybe you were right," Riza shouted.

Roy looked down and opened his mouth.

" Stop," My voice was weak.

Everyone looked at me in shock.

" He has a right to move on. He has a right to be happy and to live for something. I was selfish and stupid. He was right in one thing. He's better off without me. I am broken and no one can fix me," I croaked.

They stared at me as I rolled over to face the back of the couch.

" Go," Riza said.

" Fine," Roy answered.

I heard the door open and two sets of feet leave. Then it shut. I sighed nad decided I wanted to be alone.

" Thanks Havoc, Riza," I hugged them.

I also hugged dad, Al, Winry, and Auntie Pinako. I made my way upstairs and against my better judgement I peaked out my curtain. I was shocked by what I saw. Roy and his new boyfriend were making out. Roy was topless and I knew where things were going. I shut the curtain and tried to stop my heart from shattering any further. I went to my bed and stared at it. The memory of me and Roy came back. My heart raced and my breathing quickened. It felt like I couldn't breath. I couldn't cry either. That hurt worse than anything. I took in a few deep breaths and sat on the bed.

I fell asleep into dreams of me and Roy. We were together and happy. He was everything I needed. I sighed and stared at him but soon enough the picture in my mind faded and I was alone. Alone in my own head. I woke up and sighed again. Gently I put my feet on the floor. I peaked out of my curtain and saw Roy. He was sitting in his bed. His head was in his hands and his shoulders shook. I looked at him for a long time and realized he was crying. He looked up as if on cue and saw me. His eyes met mine for the first time in a long time and I saw everything. The hurt, the betrayal, the agony, the broken human being within. He looked down and then stood up. He beckoned me with one finger and I took it to mean to meet him. Was I ready for this?

I slipped on my shoes and silently walked through the hall to get outside. It was cold when I opened the door and he stood there. I opened my mouth to speak but found no words. Roy looked at me and an awkward silence settled over us. He moved then. His hand cupped my cheek again and he moved closer.

My body reacted. I wanted this. I wanted it so bad but I couldn't. I pushed him away.

" Don't," I muttered.

He looked at me and sighed. I could see the hope in his eyes dwindle quickly. Just as quickly as it had come.

" I won't be your toy. I won't be someone you can throw away and hurt again. What about your new boyfriend?" I asked forcefully.

" It's over between us. He was just someone who I took up on an offer. I am sorry, Ed. Whether you believe me or not," He said.

" I'm sorry can't fix everything, Roy," I growled.

" I watched you suffer and I thought what I was doing was good for you. I thought to get with this guy would help you move on," He confessed.

" So you let him use you," I yelled.

" What do you mean?" He looked down.

" You slept with him," I looked him in his eyes.

" It was part of the offer," He sighed.

" That's great Roy. You ruined yourself to try to make up for your own mistake. I can't believe you. Why did you even come here?" I glare at him.

" Because I'm not ready to give up on you yet," He looked at me.

My eyes went wide with shock.

" I'm not ready to give up on you," He repeated.


	13. Chapter 13

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 13: Where Does This Leave Us

Disclaimer: See previous chapters... I KNOW It seems lazy but I want to get to the story.

I stared at Roy for a moment. So he thought that selling his body to someone could make me better. I knew it was good intentions but what the hell. Roy seemed smarter than that. I watched his face carefully and saw that he wasn't lying.

" The boy's name is Jonathon. He made a deal with me. I had watched you hurt yourself for a while and he talked to me. He told me he'd help me get you to move on if I slept with him. My heart was breaking while I watched you. I wanted you to be happy with me. I wanted us to be together. I missed you and loved you but I knew I was bad for you. We both needed space and time to think. So I thought if you thought I was happy with someone else you would move on too. I used Jonathon because he used me too. I was his boy toy," Roy explained.

" So that's it. You did it because you loved me," I glared at him.

" Yes," He smiled bitterly.

" How many times?" I asked.

" What?" He looked at me.

" How many times did you sleep with him," I frowned.

" A few. I don't know," Roy sighed.

I looked at him and then did something on impulse. I pulled my hand back and hit him. I hit him in the face as hard as I could. He stumbled back a little.

" I deserved that," He touched his already bruising cheek.

" You dumb ass. You, I thought you were smarter than that. How could you. First off don't try to guess what is bad or good for me. You don't know me that well if you can only guess wrong. I was happy with you. Happier than I had been in a long time. I don't remember ever smiling that much. You were everything I needed and more but then you left. When you said you need to think I let you go. I did it because I KNEW you needed space. You didn't know what I needed at all. Second selling your body for free is never okay. Not even if it's for me. Why in the world would you think that's okay. If you were worried about me talk to my dad, or Al, or Auntie Pinako," I walked inside.

I tossed him an icepack from the freezer. He caught it and stared at it.

" Put it on your cheek before your face swells," I instructed.

He complied and came in to sit on the couch. It was silent other than me tapping my foot. The silence felt awkward because there was so much I wanted to say but couldn't put into words. Roy sniffled a bit and I looked to see him crying. It was on impulse again. I kneeled next to him and put my arms around him. At first his eyes widened a bit and then he leaned in to the embrace. He cried against me and I felt that feeling of falling. His hands grabbed at my shirt and dug in until I could feel his knuckles digging into my skin. I looked at the broken boy before me and sighed. I knew he was hurting but who would have thought he'd do this to himself. I cried but instead of crying for myself I cried for him. I put my head on his hair an cried for him. For his fears, his insecurities, his pain, his silent suffering. His hands wrapped around me so he was holding my back. He shut his eyes tightly and sobbed until he couldn't breath anymore. I held him all the while knowing my heart would shatter when he left again. It didn't matter though because right now Roy needed me.

" Shh It's going to be okay," I comforted him.

" No it won't because in the end we both lose. In the end I ended up used and hurt. You ended up in the hospital to the point where you might die. I can't believe I let it get this bad when all I was trying to do was help you," Roy sobbed.

" It's not your fault entirely. Not to mention you did help me. You helped me see how much I need you. You showed me that I want you to stay with me and just how fragile I am. I can't live without you," I confessed.

" Ed?" He looked at me.

" yeah," I sighed.

" After everything I've done. After all the hurt I've caused you. You still want me? You still need me?" He stared at me.

" Yes I need you more than air. I want you forever," I felt tears leak from my eyes again.

He sniffled and brushed my tears away. His face was so close to mine. I could feel his breath on me. The butterflies and nervousness from the beginning came back to me. When his lips touched my cheek I smiled. He kissed my other cheek with warm lips. Then he pulled away and checked my reaction. I smiled reassuringly and blushed. He looked so beautiful when he stared like that. I just stared back not entirely sure what to do. He didn't seem to be sure either. Roy drew in a deep breath.

" I don't know if I'm ready to kiss you yet," He smiled gently.

" That's okay. We can go as slow as you want," I smiled a little smile back.

He hugged me gently to him and breathed in my scent.

" So where does this leave us?" I looked in his eyes.

" I'm not sure yet," Roy looked into my eyes.

" Well consider it. Oh and you might want to get tested for any STD's from that boy," I advised.

" I probably should," He sighed.

" Maybe it would be best if we tried to be friends first," I offered.

" Yeah That probably would be for the best," he looked at the wall.

" Just promise me that until we figure this out you won't date anybody or get in trouble," I sighed

" I promise. Will you do the same?" He looked at me.

" Yes," I promised.

" Also, This doesn't change that I love you. I am still a bit insecure and I have thought a bit. Ed, I do love you. Now I am giving you time to think. Do you still want me?" He informed me while taking my hands.

" I will think it over. Roy, I love you too," I squeezed his hands.

" Well, It's late," Roy offered.

" Yeah and tomorrow is no school thanks to weekends. Maybe I'll see you then," I shuffled my feet shyly.

" I'd like that," He stood and walked to the door.

" Me too," I smiled.

Before he left he hugged me gently and smiled. I hugged him back and watched him walk home. He stood on his porch and waved to me. I felt better. Maybe a bit euphoric. I went back to my room and opened my curtains again. I watched as Roy smiled at me and then mouthed good night. I lay on my bed with my head swimming again and didn't know what to make of anything. I couldn't sleep now so I put on some music and began to listen to it. Winry hearing this had come down the hall.

" Ed?" She asked.

" Yeah," I looked up.

" Does this mean you're better? You haven't listened to music in a month," She looked at me with wide eyes.

" Roy and I came to a mutual agreement," I announced

" Oh really. I am so happy for you Ed," She laughed jumping on my bed.

I smiled as she started talking a mile a minute and laughing. She jumped up and went to go wake Al. Before I knew it I was engulfed in a hug between the two of them. My bed was becoming awfully crowded as they jumped on me. We tumbled to the floor in a giant heap.

" Yeah Ed, You're back," Al hugged me.

" I never left," I said.

" Yes but you were just not yourself for a while," Al explained.

" Maybe I should call Riza," Winry laughed.

She grabbed her phone from her room and called. Before I knew it I heard a squeal and someone running up the stairs and into my room. I was glomped to my floor yet again by someone. Riza hugged me so tightly I couldn't breath.

" Oh I am so happy for you," She squealed.

" It's one A.M. Don't you people sleep?" I chuckled.

" Yes but friends are so important that we drag our sleepy butts out of bed to see them," Riza smiled.

She now sat at my feet next to Winry.

"We've called the others and tomorrow we will have a party. There will be a giant cake and you will eat some of it," Winry smiled.

Her blond hair caught Al in the face as she shook her head in delight. He smiled as she apologized profusely. Riza and I just laughed. Dad came in to check on us. He was so happy to see me having fun he almost cried. What had I done to my father and friends to make them so worried? Guilt set in.

" I'm so sorry to worry you," I whispered.

" It's nothing now that you're back to normal," Al laughed patting my knee.

I smiled as they talked about the party. My eyes strayed to my window and I saw Roy bundled in his blankets asleep and smiled. Maybe we were on the road to complete recovery together.

But where does that leave us?


	14. Chapter 14

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 14: Roy, My Angel

Disclaimer: I own nothing including songs, Which there might be due to this chapter being a party.

a/n I know this is a cheesy chapter but bare with me. I have a bit of writers block...

Winry and the others kept me up all night talking. When it was time for breakfast Riza made pancakes for us. Auntie Pinako, who was blessed with sleep, Was more than happy when she saw me eating again. I smiled at the happy looks everyone had. Maybe now things would really get better.

" Oh that's right, Riza. Christmas is coming soon," Winry giggled.

" What are you getting me?" Riza laughed too.

" Not telling," Winry pranced to the other side of the room to hug Al.

Wait pranced, She pranced, Since when does she prance. I had missed a lot. There was a knock on the door and Riza answered it.

" Hey sexy," Havoc grabbed her waist and pulled her to him.

He kissed her and she swatted him with the spatula. Her hair was coming out of it's clip and her apron was askew now. He laughed at her. She looked beautiful as she smiled back. I watched how happy they were as she reached around his neck and kissed his lips. He smiled too.

A pang went through my chest and I remembered that I shouldn't be sad even though I felt it. Cain walked in behind Havoc with Chiezka holding his hand. He smiled and waved. They came over and hugged me. Havoc did the same once he disengaged from Riza and her lethal spatula.

Breda followed them in with a large cake in his hands. Winry wasn't lying when she mentioned a giant cake. Hughes stuck his head in and I remembered him from when he came here once before.

" Hey kid, Thought I'd visit. This is Gracia by the way," He walked in followed by a beautiful woman with a kind face.

" Hey Hughes long time no see," I smiled.

" Yeah I should visit more often," He smiled back.

I watched as someone else walked in. Roy smile shyly at me from behind Gracia. He had his hands in his pockets and his head down. I smiled back and felt my own blush on my face. I knew more people were probably coming because Winry had dialed a million numbers last night. Okay so maybe it was just a hundred but still.

" Hey shrimp," Roy smiled as he stood before me.

" Hey Bastard," I grinned.

Roy held his hand out to shake mine. I accepted it and briefly relished in the warmth of our touch. All to soon he pulled away and I pouted subconsciously which caused Roy to chuckle. He smiled at my face and tried not to say it but it came out anyway.

" It's really cute when you pout like that," He chuckled.

I blushed and tried to remember that I was supposed to be thinking. I knew I wanted to be with him but how. My mind began to wander but only for a second before he asked how I was.

" Fine," I smile sadly.

" I'm glad you're eating again. I like to see you're smiling too," Roy smiled.

I tried to smile at him but felt my breath going. I was so captivated by his beautiful face as he looked at me. I wanted to hug him and let him hold me. I needed him to reassure me. I needed him to tell me everything was okay but I knew right now that was not an option. I missed that tight embrace and the way my heart would skip a beat. I miss how I felt weak in the knees and How I looked forward to every minute with Roy. I felt that now but I stopped myself and shook my head. This wouldn't get to me now. Before I knew it he was whisked away by the others to play football in the cold. I declined the offer because I was still kind of weak. So I watched from the porch. The wind blew and I watched as Roy's hair blew with it.

It was a beautiful sight, the beautiful onyx strands blowing around his face. I wanted to watch it forever. Like a slow motion memory that sticks in your head. Who knew that by moving here I would meet someone who I loved so much it hurt. I was content just watching the one person I loved but may never have. It hurt when that thought struck me. I knew Roy loved me but part of me told me I had nothing to hold him. No glorious beauty, or money. While he was perfect in almost every way. I sadly drew my knees up to my chin and sighed thoughtfully. I looked up at the sky darkened with winter's clouds. My eyes stayed glued to those clouds following their slow progress across the sky. I felt a warm pair of arms wrap around me and thought it was my imagination until I looked behind me.

" What is so fascinating, kid," Roy asked from behind me.

" Nothing just the sky," I felt so comfortable that for now I let my heart win the fight with my head.

" You always do that. Are you waiting for an angel to come and take you? They might have to fight me first," He laughed.

" Maybe I am. I don't know honestly. I am waiting for something though," I answered honestly.

" Can I be your Angel?" Roy asked me.

I shifted so I could look at him. He had a sincere look on his face and I felt my heart melt.

" I know I don't deserve it. I hurt you very bad but I still like the idea of protecting you and watching over you," Roy smiled sadly.

I put a finger to his lips and he looked at me. I smiled gently and he sighed. His forehead touched mine. I felt butterflies in my stomach at his closeness. My mouth ached for his and I was going crazy. I wanted him to kiss me so bad.

" I will let you be my angel," I took his hand and twined my fingers with his.

" I love you," His eyes were shut and the wind blew his hair.

At that moment he looked like he was truly an angel. I stared in awe and found I couldn't look away from him. He sighed heavily and opened his eyes. I felt like I was someone different when he looked at me. My eyes were so wide as his eyes pierced into my soul. It felt like he knew everything in my mind at the moment. My heart was racing and I was struggling to breath right. Roy moved closer to me and smiled. Oh dear what A very sexy angel. I didn't move away and he moved closer still. His lips touched my forehead under my bangs. I melted into his embrace and touch. He held me and I smiled gently. I no longer felt the cold of the winter wind. I didn't feel empty or lonely. I felt as if I was complete in every way. I smiled again and leaned into him.

" I have a secret," I whispered.

" Really?" He asked.

" There is this boy. I want him a lot but he seems to be so distant and all I want is for him to come closer. I want to see him be happy," I announced to him.

" Oh," Roy looked down.

For a beautiful god he was really naive sometimes. He shuffled his feet behind me.

" Yeah and he is sweet and charming. He has a great smile and is very good looking. His personality is so much better though. I love him with everything I am. He is a wonderful person. I love the way he holds me and the warmth he gives off. He is a blessing in disguise," I finished.

Roy looked into my eyes and sighed. I reached a hand up to his neck and pulled him down to me. His eyes widened as I put my lips against his. My world stopped when he kissed me back gently and shyly.

" I have a secret too," He pulled away.

" What's that," I smiled.

" I can't live without you," He touched his nose to mine.

" I love you," I smiled.

" I love you too," Roy kissed me.

I felt safe and warm in the arms of Roy, my angel.

A/N yay for next chapter... There will be cake.


	15. Chapter 15

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 15: Beautiful Disaster

Disclaimer: I own nothing ... Still!

We stood on my porch like that for a while. Then Roy decided to go play again. I smiled and told him it was okay to leave me alone for a few minutes. He looked down at me and kissed my forehead again. I was glad he was taking it so slow and not rushing. I liked the idea of being with him at my own pace. I had a feeling that this would work out if we gave it our absolute best. I watched the sky. It was comforting to think that in this big world with millions or even billions, Hell Gigillions, Of people He loves me! Yes I am aware Gigillions isn't a number. He looked at me and winked.

In that instant I felt my heart flutter along with the butterflies in my stomach and I couldn't breath. He was breathtaking, even the tiniest look and it was like I was in heaven. I loved the feeling especially when he touched me. I sat down again and stared at the game, watching as everyone ran and tried to get the ball. I giggled when Winry fell on Al causing a huge pile up. After a half an hour and a brutal beating for most of them the game was over. I smiled as I got pats on the back and huge grins. My biggest smile was when Roy took my hand in his.

" Goodness, You're hands are freezing," I rubbed his hands in my smaller ones to warm them.

He smiled at me gently. I stopped all my movements and stood stock still. Roy leaned down and put his lips on mine. I took in a breath and melted into him. My eyes slowly slid shut and I felt both his hands on either side of my face. I leaned forward and he smiled against my lips. When he pulled apart I kept my eyes shut for a moment longer. Then I opened them to see him watching me carefully. He rubbed his thumb over my cheek and the look in his eyes was something I will never forget.

" Let's go inside," He took my hand again.

I stared at our hands and couldn't help but smile. My mind was a whirl of thoughts, my body was reacting in ways it never had before. I longed for him to hold me, for him to kiss me. I didn't understand all the sudden rushing of emotions that went through me at the moment. I felt like I could be the happiest person in the world.

Roy opened the door and held it for me. I walked in and he followed shaking his hair out of his eyes. I looked at the table and saw the gigantic cake on it. Oh wow, I didn't know it was humanly possible to make a cake that big. Roy stood behind me close enough to touch but kept his distance.

Winry smacked Al's hand as he took a fingerful of icing. He retaliated by sticking the icing in his mouth and smirking. It was a hilarious scene. Before I knew what was happening I was being lifted off the floor. Breda sat me on his shoulders and started to run around the house. I screamed and held on to his shirt for dear life.

" Having fun, Kid?" He asked.

" Put me down please," I asked .

He tossed me up and then sat me on my feet. Everyone else was laughing at the sight.

" Time for the cake," Winry stood with a knife in hand by the gigantic cake.

" Yay," Everyone chorused and then went to get their helpings.

I stood back and waited for all the bustling to die down. Roy handed me a plate and smiled. It was good to see him smiling again, Almost like before. He picked up my fork and put a bite of cake on it. I gave him a, " what are you doing," Look .

" Open your mouth," he said.

I obeyed silently and he put the bite in my mouth. He was feeding me now. What are we married or something. I laughed at my self for that thought. He put another bite on the fork and I ate.

" Don't you want any cake?" I asked.

" I'll wait until you eat," He answered.

" Don't be ridiculous. Here," I scooped up icing on my finger.

He looked at me and then he put my finger in his mouth. I didn't mean for him to do that, Not in front of everyone else. Oh dear, A burning sensation swept through my body. Roy gently sucked the icing off of my finger. It was such sweet torture to watch him do that and feel it at the same time. When he pulled away I missed the warmth of his mouth on my skin. Roy smiled and fed me another bite. I smiled at how cute he was being.

" Do you like it?" He asked me.

I nodded and then took another forkful. He watched me eat intently. I realized why. It was because I was still dangerously thin and he wanted to make sure I ate. He cared enough to feed me so I would eat. I took another bite and swallowed. Roy looked at me again and I saw for the first time how he was really doing in our time apart. His eyes were a little bloodshot. He also had bags under them. He didn't look as thin but had definitely lost some weight. I reached out and touch his face. He was silent but shut his eyes as I traced his skin with my fingers. He let out a breath I didn't know he was holding. I let my fingertips trace under his eyes and over his cheek bones. I gently dragged them around his lips. He twitched a bit at the tickling feeling. I pressed my hand over his chest and felt his strong heartbeat. He put his hand over mine holding it there. I watched as Roy slowly opened his eyes and looked at me with so much love I thought I would burst.

" Eat," He sighed gently.

I complied with him and took another bite that he fed me. Roy looked out the window and watched the clouds move. I watched him contently as he looked lost in his own world. I sighed wondering if he really loved me or f he was just trying to make me feel better. I wasn't selfish enough to make him stay if he didn't want too. Gently I stood and made my way over to the bathroom. No one noticed so I turned and walked in locking the door behind me. I sat on the toilet seat and brought my knees up to my chest. I breathed in and sighed. There was a light knock on the door.

"Ed, are you okay? You just disappeared on me," Roy's voice sounded.

" I'm fine," I replied gently.

" Can I come In?" He asked.

" Yeah," I got up and unlocked the door.

He walked in and shut the door behind him. One look at me and he knew something was wrong. He pulled me to him and patted my hair. I took comfort in his embrace. He rubbed my back with his hand and sighed.

" Ed, What's wrong?" He asked quietly.

" Do you love me?" I blurted out.

" Of course," He looked at me with wide eyes.

" How much?" I pushed.

" I love you more than life itself! More than anything," He held me tighter.

I breathed him in and shut my eyes. He chuckled.

" You really are a disaster. A beautiful disaster... My Beautiful Disaster," He smiled.

His lips settled on mine. I was his beautiful disaster!


	16. Chapter 16

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 16: Falling Apart at the Seams

Disclaimer: I own nothing including any songs used in here.

I smiled as I skimmed the last few pages of my new favorite book. I was aware of his eyes on me. Silently watching every move I made. Roy sat in my chair at my computer desk choosing songs to listen to. Currently he was playing Beautiful Disaster by Kelly Clarkson. It was my song as he called it. I was trying to decipher his expression, It was a mix of daydreaming and sleepiness. I turned back to my book and hoped he would sleep some. It had been two days since we got back together and he rarely left my side. It was good to have him here but I worried about him. He smiled at me and I tried to the racing of my heart as I looked at him.

His legs stretched out and he stood. I tried my hardest to keep looking at the page I was on but it was the fifth time I had read the same sentence. His hands settled on either side of my head as if to make sure I wouldn't turn away. I shifted feeling as if I had just run a marathon with how breathless I was. He smirked at me and lowered his face to mine. I felt the fluttering in my stomach start and my heart raced about a mile a second. I was staring into his eyes. I could see everything there. Love, Concern, Want, Need, and A glint of Mischief. I had to smile at that and he used it to his advantage. He lowered his lips to mine and began kissing me. I felt his tongue lick my bottom lip asking for entrance. I opened my mouth and let him in. I let out a soft moan as his tongue touched mine softly. He thoroughly explored my mouth causing me to moan over and over again. My fingers slipped into his silky hair and settled there. When I needed to breath I tugged lightly on his hair and he pulled back.

" I love you, Ed," Roy put his head on my stomach.

" I love you too, Roy," I smiled at him and shut my eyes.

I must have fallen asleep. When I woke up Roy was still laying on my stomach. He looked really cute when he was asleep. I wanted to watch him forever. He stirred slightly and moaned something.

" Grumble...Ed...Grumble...Cake...Sugar," Roy shifted again.

I giggled a bit at the nonsense he was spouting. I reached for my book and sighed silently. I loved to read so It didn't bother me that Roy was lying on me I was reading. The music still played a new song now though. I listened to the soft tune and soothing lyrics of it. I let them wash over me and decided I couldn't be happier than I was right now. There was a soft breath in and than Roy moved to sit up a bit. He smiled at me groggily. I smile back and sat up a little more. He moved up so he was straddling my hips. I felt it all gain as he came closer.

Roy placed his forehead against mine and sighed deeply. I knew what he wanted but I also knew it was at my pace. He wanted a kiss. I moved up closer and placed my lips against his gently. He smiled when I pulled back and then put his arms around me.

" What were you dreaming about?" I asked with mild interest.

" Nothing," He blushed.

" Oh really? Maybe You'd tell me if I did this," I reached up again and pressed my lips against his neck.

He groaned as I moved my lips against him. I smiled and scraped my teeth gently across his skin. He moaned. I knew it was driving him crazy and I was having fun. He wanted more and I knew I shouldn't play with him but I wanted to know.

" Fine It was about you and something else," he managed in between heavy breaths.

" What else," I asked and then gently licked his collar bone.

" Things you will not hear about," He said as firmly as he could.

He tried to pull away but my arms pulled him back. My lips crashed against his roughly. It was the best kiss of my entire life. I wanted this, I really did. I tugged at Roy's shirt gently. He lifted his arms so I could pull it over his head. He quickly picked up the kiss where we left off. I smile as his fingers worked quickly to unbutton my shirt. He pulled it open at last and his hands touched my chest. His skin was hot on mine. I moaned gently feeling as if I was going out of my mind already. Roy stopped and looked at me. He sighed gently and pulled back.

" No, Not yet," He said.

I looked at him confused. Did he not want me. Was he still thinking about whether we belonged together.

" I want to be sure you're ready and I am not going to hurt you again," He put his hand on my cheek.

I looked into his deep blue eyes and got lost in them. He really was worried about me that much. My lips curved upward in a gentle smile at the expression on his face. He really did look like an angel in that instance. The moment was shattered when Al knocked on the door to feed me lunch. Screw Food I wanted to stay like this with Roy forever.

I ate The food graciously anyway and sighed happily when it was gone. Al smiled at how I was becoming healthier again. Most of it was because Roy but a few Times Winry threatened me with a wrench. I wanted to keep my pretty boy face thank you! Winry told us that the gang would be going to Breda's house to have a Movie Night/Sleepover. I smiled and got up to pack my stuff.

Roy grabbed me around my waist and pulled me back down. I landed on top of him with a loud swishing sound. He smirked at me and I melted like butter on a hotplate. Oh the things rushing through my head at the moment. I felt my face grow hot and I must have been red as a tomato. His hands ran down and rested on my hips gently. I felt my body grow hot as well. I didn't honestly know if I was ready for something like this but I wanted to be with him. I wanted him to become one with me again. Maybe I was rushing a bit but It felt so right. I knew he would wait though so he was just trying to show me he loved me.

He kissed my forehead and wrapped his arms around me tightly. I buried my head in his chest and sighed contently. My breath hitched when he started to draw slow circles on my back with his fingers. It felt soft and sweet to me. I loved being so close to him and having it be an innocent thing.

" I love you, Ed," Roy whispered into my hair.

" I love you too," Came my muffled reply from his chest.

His sweatshirt smelled like him and I inhaled deeply. I shut my eyes and surrounded myself with all that was Roy Mustang. My friend and my lover. Maybe we were young but I had a feeling this would be forever. I would only ever belong to him. My mind calmed from the usual buzz it was in and only had one thought, Roy. Everything was about him right now. The way he smelled, looked, felt, the rhythm of his heartbeat and every breath he took. I made to get up and break the trance. Roy let me this time. He watched me collect my things in a bag and get ready to go later.

" You do know we won't leave until later right?" He chuckled.

" Yes but if I forget something now I'll remember later before we leave," I smiled wisely.

He chuckled again and buried his head in my pillow. I smiled as he lightly shut his eyes and smiled. Gorgeous was the only word to describe him. Like a male model. Oh how lucky I was to have him. I watched as he stretched his arms over his head. His shirt went up showing a bit of his stomach and I felt a blush spread across my porcelain cheeks. He let out a breath and it moved his hair slightly. I smiled and stood watching him. He noticed the lack of motion and peaked an eye open.

" What?" he asked when he saw me staring.

" I was just watching you lay there," I smiled at him.

He stood and stretched. His shirt ruffled up again and I blushed again. If only he knew what he did to me every time he moved like that. It was slightly embarrassing for me to find myself gawking at him like that. What's worse is I was constantly blushing around him now. I was a permanent red color. He chuckled as he noticed. He inched closer and wrapped his arms around me loosely. He breathed in my ear and I shivered. He smiled against my skin and I felt my heart race. My blood boiled and I turned in his hold. His lips instantly closed over mine. I breathed in and felt as if I had died and gone to heaven.

I moaned softly in his mouth. He smiled and kissed me harder. Why was he driving me crazy today. I was feeling seriously sexually frustrated. Maybe he was testing me, I mean he had to know what he was doing to me. In that instant as he was kissing me and the world seemed to slow down, In his arms, I was falling apart at the seams.


	17. Chapter 17

New School, New Life, New Feelings

Chapter 17: Christmas Could Never Be Better

Disclaimer: I own nothing sadly... But one day who knows...

A/N Thank you to all my reviewers and Readers. Also to the people that have been here since the beginning. I love you guys and this story is for you.

I was watching the snow fall on Christmas Eve. It was a beautiful sight as I sat on my porch with hot chocolate. Roy was setting up his Camera to take pictures. Apparently he had discovered a new talent, Photography. I smiled as he started to take pictures of the sky and the snow. I never noticed the camera turn on me. He said my name softly and I looked up.

" Got Ya!" He exclaimed as the flash momentarily blinded me.

I blinked as he laughed at me. I couldn't be angry not when his laugh sounded like the most beautiful sound I had ever heard. I threw some snow at him and laughed. He turned back to taking pictures of his surroundings. Roy was a natural. I had seen some of his pictures from the club he was in at school and they were exceptionally wonderful. He blushed when I kissed his cheek and told him that.

" Let's take a picture together," He shouted.

I smiled and stood as he put the camera on the stand. He came behind me and put his arms around me. His head peaked around my shoulder and we smiled. The timer clicked one last time and the flash went again. I couldn't wait to see the picture once it was developed. He smiled as he took his camera off the stand. I looked up at him and he smiled down. I kissed the tip of his red nose. He chuckled and took a sip of my hot chocolate.

" Let's go Inside and get warm," Roy smirked.

" I think that's a very good idea," I blushed at him.

Roy took my hand and I followed him inside of the warm house. Auntie Pinako had a pie baking in the oven for tomorrow's dessert. It was cherry I could smell it. It made my mouth water. Winry and Al were shopping for last minute presents. Dad was with them and Auntie Pinako was occupied with cooking. I smiled at how mom used to act during the holidays. So carefree and happy while she bustled around the kitchen. I remember the time she almost set the house on fire when she was cooking pudding in a pot. It was funny because nothing actually caught fire but it came close. Roy squeezed my hand when he realized I was dazed. I snapped out of my reverie and looked at him. He smiled wistfully seeing the look on my face and pulled me to my room. He silently shut the door behind us.

" Ed. I know it's hard around this time for you. I know you miss your mom and if you need to talk I'm here," Roy let his arm wrap around me.

I easily fit in his embrace and buried my face in his sweater taking in his scent. I felt the tears come into my eyes and spill over. His arms tightened comforting me in my grief. Roy put his hand under my chin and lifted my face up. I was staring him in the eyes. His lips settled over mine and the kiss was warm. I let him deepen it and became lost in the feeling. He was gentle as his hands slid down my body. I knew what was coming and I was ready for it. Roy picked me up and carried me to my bed. He placed me down and kissed me again. When we surfaced for air he tugged my sweater over my head.

Clothes were strewn around the room and lost in dark corners. Little moans and groans were slipping past lips and faded into the air. Sweat and skin mingled as we both came closer to the edge.

" I love you," Roy nuzzled my hair as we lay wrapped in blankets on my bed.

" I love you too," I cuddled closer to his warmth.

His arms wrapped around my bare waist and I smiled at how complete I felt. It wasn't awkward or confusing. This time it was more natural and just came to me. I lay my head against Roy's chest and sighed contently.

" We should get dressed before someone catches us," Roy chuckled at me.

" I guess so...," I smiled.

Roy stood to find his clothes. He slipped his boxers on and then found the rest of his clothes. He found mine too and handed them to me. The smile on his face was enough to make me melt. It was heart warming to see him so happy.

" Wait," He said.

I looked at him and he held up his camera. He snapped the picture before I realized what he was doing. He took a picture of me, Still lying wrapped in the blankets and naked. I blinked and shifted.

" No one better see that," I growled.

" No this is one of the most beautiful pictures I've taken. People will see it eventually," Roy smirked.

I threw my pillow at his face and hit him. Then I proceeded to laugh as he pouted at me. My clothes were still in my hands. I stood to dress myself but felt a hand stop me. Roy took my underwear and pushed me back down on the bed. He put them on one foot then the other. He pulled them up to my waist and snapped the band. He grabbed my pants and did the same thing. Then he slipped my shirt over my head. I was confused at why he was dressing me but I let him do it anyway.

There was a knock on my door a few minutes later and I jumped.

" Come In," Roy's smooth voice said.

Winry walked in and looked at us suspiciously. We just looked back wondering if she could see in us what had just happened. She placed a few bags down in front of me.

" Ed I need you to hide these. Al is always coming in my room and he has a big mouth when it comes to gifts and keeping them a secret," She grinned.

" Please?" I pouted.

" Please!" She sighed.

" Okay I'll do it," I smiled.

" You two should have sex more often. It puts Ed in a good mood," She pranced out of the room giggling.

I tried to find something to throw at her but she was already gone. Damn! I will get her back next just wait and see. I took the bags and put them in my closet. The already wrapped gifts were on top while the ones she would wrap today were hidden in the bottom. Roy chuckled at my little outburst.

His arms fell around me and I smiled again. He swayed with me in his arms and I closed my eyes and sighed. It was almost perfect. I heard the whizzing of his camera and then looked up as the flash went off.

" It was to perfect not to," Riza sighed.

Roy just smiled then held out his hand. She gave him the camera and looked down expecting to get in trouble.

" Riza, Stand next to Ed," Roy ordered softly.

" Oh Okay," She smiled.

I placed my arm on her shoulder and she put her fingers in one of my belt loops. It had to be a comical picture. We put on the cheesiest smiles and at the end we were laughing.

Roy left to develop his pictures. Winry and I finished wrapping her gifts as Riza talked to havoc.

" I'm Back," Roy poked his head in the front door.

" Hey," Was the reply he got from my dad.

" Ed want to see my pictures?" He asked.

I nodded and we collapsed onto the worn out living room couch. He spread the pictures out on the table. I studied the many different pictures.

One was of Roy's mom while she cooked. Her hair pulled, A reminiscing and wistful smile on her face. The bacon in the pan looked as if it was burning. The dreamy expression on her face let you know she was a million miles away from her body. Her mind was lost in thoughts.

Another was Riza and Winry. They sat at their school desk. Their mouths were open in chatter and both wore a look of bored excitement at the same old thing. Riza's hair was thrown in a pony tail and curved at the end. Her eyes were shining with the excitement. Winry wore her hair pin straight and it was in mid swing as she gossiped.

There was one of the guys. Fuery stood smiling brightly with his math book in his hands. Havoc, as always, Had a cigarette hanging in his mouth and smile around it. His hand rested on Roy's shoulder. Breda was smiling with a football in one hand and his jacket in the other. I was next to him. I was surprised at how happy I looked. Al stood next to me with his silly grin plastered on his face. We looked so happy together.

Chiezka and Fuery kissing. They stood in front of her locker his arms wrapped around her. A ghost of a smile on both their faces as there lips touched gently. It was so beautiful to see the tiny act of passion.

Winry and Al holding hands walking in the store. They both wore identical smiles and laughed as they looked over at Roy.

Havoc held Riza and she was giggling as he tickled her. His fingers were a blur and he wore a huge grin on his face. Riza clung to his arms trying to get him off.

Me and Roy when we took our picture together. His arms around me and his head on my shoulder. My smile was so true that I couldn't help but touch the photo.

Hughes with his arms around Gracia. Both of them smiling gently as he held her close. He was whispering in her ear and she was on the verge of giggles in the second picture.

The most striking picture wasn't taken by Roy. It was of Roy. He stood with his hands deep in his pockets. There was no smile on his face. Instead he wore a serious look. His head was to the side facing the sinking sun. His hair was strewn around from the wind. It was so beautiful, So magnetic.

" you can keep it," He broke my reverie.

" Huh?" I looked up.

" Keep the picture. It's the one you took of me yesterday," He smiled.

I picked up the picture and smiled even wider. I hung the picture in my room.

Soon the house was packed with friends and neighbors to celebrate tomorrow's holiday. Roy stood with his arms around me gently. I thought to myself, Christmas could never be better!


End file.
